I don't know if it's controversial but I struggle with the disability label too, as I masked a lot growing up. I get swayed from one side to the other as time passes.

For me there are parts of me that I don't want to be neurotypical like how NT small talk, social hierarchy, judgment, group politics etc works. I also like how I view and understand things.

There are parts like executive function deficits, hypersensitivity, difficulty understanding emotions and so on that I would like to get better at. So it's a mixed bag.