One of the most basic facts about biology we have known for decades is that a woman's estrogen levels are supposed to go up and down quite significantly during the course of her cycle. A cycle that starts around the same time as Puberty and which ends during menopause.
It makes no sense to me that in spite this being common knowledge doctors and even fellow trans people will parrot the idea that you can just average a woman's cycle out and as long as you stay around that average (often far below average) you'll be fine.
To me this comes from the transphobic idea that trans women and cis women are these fundamentally different creatures who respond to estrogen very definitely.
I didn't test this intentional at first but "luckily" Hrt isnt a thing in my country (trans people as far as the medical system is concerned don't exist) so I've been forced to DIY. As a result of fumbling around trying to figure out my doses without really checking levels I came to realize multiple things.
My sex drive changes depending on my dose. High doses meant for the week my libido would be very high low doses meant the opposite.
Where I felt changes (my skin stretching from fat redistribution) changed depending on dosage. Typically a lower dose meant more chest development while a higher dose meant I felt more stretching in my hips)
Emotional changes where either more present or less present depending levels
After doing a bit o research I found that all these things are natural things the majority of women go through during their cycle.
The trans people who completely lose their ability to have a libido are likely just on a dose which represents a low for them and since they constantly stay at a low they don't experience what their natural libido is supposed to be.
And on the flip side the trans people who become hyper sexual have the reverse issue. They are constantly at a level which represents a "high" for them meaning they never get a break from it and are also robbed of what a natural libido is supposed to feel like.
I'm tired of people trying to claim at x dose you should experience changes as if looking feminine is the only function of estrogen in the human body and as if "average levels" Don't already look way different from person to person.
Trans women are normal women and shouldn't be robbed of as natural of a hormone system as possible. Our current system is working backwards from the idea that trans women are just men who "want" To look like women when that's not true.
I sense your frustration and empathize. I cannot imagine how challenging it must be to manage your levels without the benefit of doctors or proper lab tests. Working from first principles and self observation takes amazing patience and discipline.
However, while transphobia and bigotry is ascendant right now, I’m not entirely sure we can use your account as evidence of widespread systemic malpractice against our people.
I have a doctor, she prescribes estradiol valerate and spiro, and tests my blood every 3 months. We work as a team to produce hormone levels that will eventually converge with those of any afab.
The thing is, everyone is different from the jump. Even with the benefit of a fully equipped treatment plan, my physiological goals are a moving target that we can, at best, only approach.
There’s no conspiracy, other than the social conventions of gender that held me prisoner for decades.
There is widespread malpractice against us in other forms for sure, like too high blocker dosages, too low E doses (just general incompetence), gatekeeping HRT in the first place, different kinds of conversion practices like purposefully long wait times for diagnosis, etc.
But yeah, this in particular is not malpractice but lack of research. This isn't standard and there's no research to suggest this would be safe and effective and so I doubt any doctor could prescribe a cyclical regime. That's not to say it isn't true that it is safe and effective, but they can't know and so therefore it's just not in line with how they operate.
I do wish there was more research on effective medical transition, but we're a small market in a patriarchal and capitalist world