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Off My Chest
RULES:
I am looking for mods!
1. The "good" part of our community means we are pro-empathy and anti-harassment. However, we don't intend to make this a "safe space" where everyone has to be a saint. Sh*t happens, and life is messy. That's why we get things off our chests.
2. Bigotry is not allowed. That includes racism, sexism, ableism, homophobia, transphobia, xenophobia, and religiophobia. (If you want to vent about religion, that's fine; but religion is not inherently evil.)
3. Frustrated, venting, or angry posts are still welcome.
4. Posts and comments that bait, threaten, or incite harassment are not allowed.
5. If anyone offers mental, medical, or professional advice here, please remember to take it with a grain of salt. Seek out real professionals if needed.
6. Please put NSFW behind NSFW tags.
I really liked it when I was going through mania—the complete opposite of right now. But lately I’ve noticed how empty I feel. Like most things now, it feels impossible and that I physically cannot do it. I don’t know how to describe it. But I guess that’s depression for you. I know that I need to get better, but I’m so familiar with these feelings that I don’t want to. It’s what I know.
I think I will swear off of men again. These feelings remind me why I swore off of them the last time. And the time before. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thank you for taking the time to type out such a thoughtful reply. You give me hope that there are others out there that have such sincerity and empathy.
Yeah that is the toughest part. No-one can do it for you, unfortunately. If you can, you can try professional help. But it is you that needs to take the first step. And that is very hard, so wishing you luck is the best I can do.
It's good taking your time there as well. You need to be in the business of learning to love yourself first. You cannot find stability with another if you haven't found it in yourself.
If you've lived through it you know how much a little can help a lot. And that helping others is one of the most fundamental things we can do as human beings. I hope that -in due time, after finding your ground- you will be in a position to do so for others!
I got my next appointment moved up to next week. It’s kind of wild to see how far down I’ve fallen since our last visit. Though crying it out earlier helped me think with a clearer head afterward.