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me_irl
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this post was submitted on 18 Feb 2026
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me_irl
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I once had a long-time friend (through her shirt/sleeve holes) take her bra off and throw it at me and then sit on my lap at a party once.
It was another 3 years before I found out she had a huge crush on me and was hoping I would do literally anything other than sit there awkwardly
We really should start teaching people to use words to communicate
That's how my wife got me.
She told me directly. No "read the room" BS. No "pick up the signals". No twirling her hair and winking at you.
Just straight talk. "I'm having a good time. So grab my boobs and then put your tongue in my mouth."
Women really don't understand how straight our brains work. We like straightforward things. Straiggt to the point.
Works every time
That's not reliable, either.
I once was encouraged, vocally and clearly, by a girl to cross the room and kiss her. It would have been my first kiss or, indeed, romantic encounter of any kind in person.
I didn't and we just sat on opposite couches until our friends got tired of checking on us and took us our separate ways.
To be fair, in the era of "first kiss" it's important to remember that we are all awkward as fuck.
Hell, I still am. Nigh a decade of marriage and six years of parenthood and I still have to consider whether my wife wants to be associated with me.
However, I will admit it's not... Usually... As awkward as that first time.
That's not very clear. I mean, there's a variety of reasons why she could have done all of that. You did well to wait three years.
There was this gathering at pub with 10 people or so. I was sitting closely with one, imagine sides touching the hole night, arms around eachother's waists etc. The others eventually left. When we are the only last two from the group, she told me how good of friend I am and ho safe she feels with me.
I've been taught that advancing on that is grounds for rape. Removing a bra and throwing it at you is not consent.
Not sure if sarcasm, so don't ask.
I think the idea is that you don’t immediately choose full penetration as the next step, but rather a small move, like a hand on the waist, and judge her reaction, then go from there.
Then it's merely battery. /s