462
The cops pay Anon a visit
(sh.itjust.works)
you are viewing a single comment's thread
view the rest of the comments
view the rest of the comments
this post was submitted on 05 Feb 2026
462 points (100.0% liked)
Greentext
8153 readers
3 users here now
This is a place to share greentexts and witness the confounding life of Anon. If you're new to the Greentext community, think of it as a sort of zoo with Anon as the main attraction.
Be warned:
- Anon is often crazy.
- Anon is often depressed.
- Anon frequently shares thoughts that are immature, offensive, or incomprehensible.
If you find yourself getting angry (or god forbid, agreeing) with something Anon has said, you might be doing it wrong.
founded 2 years ago
MODERATORS
And here's where we introduce you to this magical term called full disk encryption!
And if you use BitLocker, do NOT backup your recovery key to the cloud!
https://gizmodo.com/microsoft-reportedly-turned-over-bitlocker-encryption-keys-to-the-fbi-2000713550
Print out out, give it to a friend, don't mention it via electronic means (email, text, Snapchat, YouTube, and so on...)
And if you use BitLocker, don't!
What is a better windows alternative?
Veracrypt
Linux.
I said for Windows not linux
Even better is to memorize it.
Hide it in a poem in a leather bound book at the end of a trap-filled dungeon.
Ill be honest, this is clearly the best idea out there for passwords safety
Now when you say a trap-filled dungeon. What exactly do you mean?
nothing incriminating, your honour, just some harmless pranks such as water buckets above the doors.
I don’t think that’s the kind of trap they were alluding to…
Oh, I got that, I just refuse to entertain the possibility.
Y’know what, fair enough.
Hide it in a book in a buried chest on a minecraft world 5000 blocks from spawn.
Unironically not a terrible idea. Who tf would check your minecraft for irl keys. Could probably have a library in a world just full. Probably isnt encrypted though. Probably just plain text in a game file on your drive somewhere
I stole from someone else that hid the urls of porn sites in a chest when he was a kid. Think it was pretty old, probably on Reddit, learned about it maybe 2 years ago. I don't know anything about encryption or protecting sensitive information, certainly not of this nature, but it could potentially work. Would be quite a few chests full if anon is doing something with a lot of intricate details.
Don’t print it. Your previous prints are easily retrievable
I think I've heard if you have a Microsoft account it automatically gets backed up
This person should also turn off their computer and remove the RAM so it's zeroed out if it gets siezed.
Full disk encryption doesn't help much if the pc is running anyway since the key will be in memory
How will they carry the running pc if it’s not a laptop?
They have a battery attached to flat wires. When you give a couple millimeters of room from the plug, they insert the flat wires and the computer will be powered from the battery.
HotPlug Field Kit
If the computer is logged in, they have a USB device that mimics a mouse. It makes the mouse pointer move back and forth to prevent it from going to sleep or the screen saver.
They use forensic tools to clone the RAM before moving it. Probably depends on exploits so whether it will work may depend on your OS, but they have access to the hardware so there are a lot of possibilities.
Is this actually practically achievable or mostly theoretical in a lab? Is it confirmed that the cops have actually managed to do this?
For password guessing they make clones of the computer so they can make countless instances of it to endlessly guess the password at the speed of dickheads to get around the systems cutting the guesser off after a number of attempts.
You can do this for servers. Desktops would be no problem
This is where I think NFC may finally be useful. If cops show up, I slide my phone by a hidden NFC tag, and an http request is sent to my desktop machine. Everything incriminating is wiped and the computer is turned off, before the cops can walk to the room.
Unless you have tied the NFC to an arc wielding torch how would proper data disposal process runs its course fast enough? You live in a manor with very long hallways?
Most of really nasty data is text or a few questionable apps, and should take very little time. Video and audio present a problem, but I think they can be speedily wiped by nuking the metadata parts, making recovery and identification difficult. Not sure how resilient modern formats are to data loss, but afaik e.g. AVI is quite reliant on the description of the stream (which iirc is inconveniently placed at the end of the file).
Nha my dude you’re lying to yourself if you think that it is nearly enough to survive the level of forensics that will happen in case of a motivated investigation. You need the whole multipass erasure and overwriting or you’re toast. It takes hours…
First of all, it doesn't take hours to overwrite several text files and a few binaries. Second of all, I think I know better what my local cops would do. It's not NSA or Interpol. Lastly, this hypothetical obviously excludes stuff after which 'motivated investigation' might come. That kind of data lives in encrypted files tucked in odd places, and even that can probably be wiped from the directory entry like it was never there.
Erh well, it takes hours with proper tooling with which I have first hand experience… and just as much experience with various police forces… admittedly my knowledge is limited to Europe and LA on that topic.
For reference I saw them deploy very serious means for stuff from csam to piracy so be careful on how you perceive their willing to be major annoyances.
But hey, this is my work experience I offer, you don’t take it it’s not an issue; I’m not invoicing my time anyway :)
Better to have a "spare" pc under your desk, with the real one hidden.
Cheaper and you won't accidentally wipe your pc all the time.
But what are you all having on up your PCs??
Where I am, having a networked machine cemented up in the wall is the national pastime, for when a bunch of masked policemen show up with automatic rifles. As for what's on that machine, that's another national sport because no one is paying for those bastards to harass businesses.
If it can be proven you did that, that's gonna look real bad in court.
You can get in legal trouble for turning off your PC?
There's no law against googling how to dispose of a body, but if you do, and you're a suspect in a murder, it's a real bad look for you.
Same story here. Probably legal, but definitely not a good look.
If it's proven that you did it, you are getting locked up anyway.
In 99% it is better to not say anything or indict yourself
Edit: ah, misunderstood you, with "did that" you mean turn off the computer, not whatever crime you are accused of. I'd still disagree, but only based on anecdotes, go ask a lawyer, I guess
Yeah... About that.
Yeah, refusing a warrant is definitely a separate crime from whatever they're looking for on the computer. If something like this happens, the only way to protect yourself from a warrant is to fully delete everything on your computer. They can't arrest you for not handing over something that doesn't exist. The cops know this though, which is why they probably wouldn't give you that kind of warning without having a warrant ready to go, which is because this story is fake.