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finding a name
(self.mtf)
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this post was submitted on 09 Aug 2023
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Transfem
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My best advice is to keep it simple and natural. Start using it online, you'll get used to seeing it, and the rest will follow.
I started by reinstalling my OS to have my full chosen name as my user account, and taking a nice femme selfie. I own a domain and custom email, so I set one up for that name that will slowly gain more and more of my digital identity and accounts until the old email is basically just spam where I’ll probably just keep it as an archive in case I miss something in the migration and slowly let it fade into the background.
I don’t know how I will feel in the future, but as it is now, I expect being deadnamed will just be a part of the process, so I’m not too hung up on it.
I had a chosen name and a legal name prior, so it’s not an adjustment to have old friends and acquaintances not catch the memo, and anyone who is just being toxic about it can be eliminated very easily even if it’s family. Wouldn’t be the first time we’ve disowned each other.