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egg_irl — Memes about being trans people in denial and other eggy topics
!egg_irl
!egg_irl is for widely relatable memes about questioning one's gender or being an egg (a trans person in denial) as well as other eggy topics.
If you are looking for a place to discuss something specific to you or especially if you need help or are in crisis, we have communities and resources that can support you linked at the bottom of this sidebar.
General Rules:
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No bigotry.
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No spam, bots, or vote farming.
Rules on Content:
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No reposts.
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No personal-life posts, bingo cards, quizzes, selfies, "trans/not trans" lists, picrew, or non-memes.
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No visible names or usernames.
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Do not post or link to pornography.
Rules on Post Titles and Tags:
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Posts must be titled "egg_irl". An emoji or two is OK, but they have to be between "egg" and "irl".
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Posts that assume the viewer's gender and/or contain potentially triggering content must be spoilered and tagged at the beginning of the post title. Example content-warning tags that you can copy include the following:
[CW: Assumes Viewer is Transmasc]
[CW: Assumes Viewer is Transfem]
[CW: Assumes Viewer is Nonbinary]
[CW: Transphobia]
[CW: Violence]
[CW: Weapons/Firearms]
[CW: Disturbing Imagery]
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You may optionally include other tags, such as:
[Transmasc Meme]
[Transfem Meme]
[Nonbinary Meme]
[Gender-Nonspecific Meme]
Rules on Post Text:
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If possible, include an image description for accessibility.
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Add sources for art.
Rules on Comments
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If a post is tagged with a specific gender identity, keep the conversation centered on that identity.
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You must follow the Egg Prime Directive. You may not push or coerce people into identifying or not identifying a certain way. You must respect them as the gender they claim to identify as. In addition it is extremely in poor taste to make assumptions about other people's identities based on external factors, we understand it cannot be helped but it is best not to as it can affect the way you treat others in noticeable ways.
Recommendations:
We strongly encourage you to include your pronouns in your account bio so that others know how to refer to you without misgendering you. If you're questioning or unsure of your pronouns, that's totally cool—just say so.
Sibling Meme Communities
- !traa (or search for https://lemmy.ca/c/traaaaaaannnnnnnnnns in your instance if the link doesn't work)
Sibling Non-Meme Communities
- !transgender (or search for https://lemmy.ml/c/transgender in your instance if the link doesn't work)
- !trans (or search for https://lemmy.blahaj.zone/c/trans in your instance if the link doesn't work)
- !ftm (and transmasc) (or search for https://lemmy.blahaj.zone/c/ftm in your instance if the link doesn't work)
- !mtf (and transfem) (or search for https://lemmy.blahaj.zone/c/mtf in your instance if the link doesn't work)
- !nonbinary@lemmy.one (or search for https://lemmy.one/c/nonbinary in your instance if the link doesn't work)
- !lgbtq_plus@beehaw.org (or search for https://beehaw.org/c/lgbtq_plus in your instance if the link doesn't work)
- !lgbtq_plus@lemmy.blahaj.zone (or search for https://lemmy.blahaj.zone/c/lgbtq_plus in your instance if the link doesn't work)
Community Resources:
- The Trevor Project / 1-866-488-7386 — A US-based crisis prevention and intervention hotline and community
- TransLifeLine / 1-877-565-8860 — A US-based trans peer support hotline
- The Gender Dysphoria Bible — An in-depth explanation of the different types of gender dysphoria
- Trans Resources — A directory of resources for trans, non-binary, and gender-non-conforming people
- LGBTQ+ Healthcare Directory — A directory of LGBTQ+ accepting Healthcare providers
- Trans Resistance Network — A US-based mutual-aid organization to help trans people facing state violence and legal discrimination
- TLDEF's Trans Health Project — Advice about insurance claims for trans healthcare procedures
- TransLifeLine's ID change Library — A comprehensive guide to changing your name on any US legal document
Same for me, too. Although on reflection, certain things like practicing tucking to resemble female genitals, offering to present a school event in drag, and praying to wake up as a girl, may not have had entirely cis motivations.
I also assumed that my complete failure to fit in at an all-boys school was just due to being a nerdy kid.
I really didn't have obvious signs, as most of my symptoms were attributed to autism. I didn't like going shirtless, although I wasn't sure why. I hated going into men's locker rooms and didn't fit in well with most boys, except the boy with long hair. I was jealous of him and always wanted to grow mine out, but my mom would constantly tell me that I wouldn't like longer hair because it gets heavy and hot.
However, I never once felt like I was a girl or felt like I wanted to be a girl. I was fine with feminine things, but many of them are too much trouble to get too invested in outside of special occasions. I want to know how to walk in heels, but I rarely want to wear them (not to mention I'm already conscious about my height 😖)
Maybe not obvious, but those all sound like signs to me! But that's the thing about denial, right? I'd put everything down to intrusive thoughts, and if you asked me any time up to the day my egg cracked, I'd have been convinced that I'd never wanted to be a girl.
I'm not trying to suggest that your experience was anything other than you say, of course. It just sounded very familiar!
I know what you mean, and you are correct about those being signs. The main challenge was how my suspected autism got in the way of me recognizing it.
Despite definitely being autistic, the doctors that could've diagnosed me as kid, didn't. My personal theory is that it's related to the underdiagnosing of cis girls with autism. Although it's often attributed to girls being socialized differently, I have met a number of transfems who, like cis women, weren't diagnosed with autism until later in life. It's like the doctors expect a male gendered type of autism in AMABs, so they underdiagnose us too -_- (again, just a pet hypothesis that I'll never get to test)
Anyhow, I was always very unhappy about my social existence, feeling out of place as I tried to hang out with boys. Kinda like the stereotype of boys finding girls mysterious, I did not understand dudes at all. However, I also failed to realize the gender differences because I felt pressured to only hang out with boys. I was a goodie-two-shoes who always tried to do what was expected of me without being asked. I needed to play as a boy character because I was a boy, end of conversation ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
When it comes to signs, I still discover new ones whenever I think about my past. I always did suck at finding the answer when I had no idea what it should look like 😭
It took a long time to realize the shirtless and locker things weren't just because I'm fat :/
Long hair is super worth it tho