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submitted 2 months ago by MicroWave@lemmy.world to c/news@lemmy.world

Christian Dingus, 28, was with his partner when, he says, employees told the couple not to kiss inside, and the argument escalated outside.

A gay man accused a group of Washington, D.C., Shake Shack employees of beating him after he kissed his boyfriend inside the location while waiting for their order.

Christian Dingus, 28, was with his partner and a group of friends at a Dupont Circle location Saturday night when the incident occurred, he told NBC News. They had put in their order and were hanging around waiting for their food.

“And while we were back there — kind of briefly — we began to kiss,” Dingus said. “And at that point, a worker came out to us and said that, you know, you can’t be doing that here, can’t do that type of stuff here.”

The couple separated, Dingus said, but his partner got upset at the employee and insisted the men had done nothing wrong. Dingus’ partner was then allegedly escorted out of the restaurant, where a heated verbal argument occurred.

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[-] kryptonianCodeMonkey@lemmy.world 22 points 2 months ago

There is never a reason for either party to escalate a verbal disagreement to a physical one, but I would be very shocked if the PDA were as innocent as they imply it was for someone to walk out from behind the counter and calmly ask them to knock it off. There are always two sides to every altercation, and even his description, "kind of briefly - we began to kiss" sounds like downplaying the degree of the kissing going on. It sounds like there was a good chance that it was a pretty excessive makeout session. They really seem to want to make it a homophobia thing, and maybe it was... whether the employees' line for excessive would have been the same for a straight couple as for this gay one, I don't know. But I wouldn't be shocked if the request was at least arguably reasonable for a business that doesn't need people sucking face at the counter. Or maybe I'm wrong and the entire restaurant staff in left-leaning Washington DC are just a bunch of homophobes. Idk.

[-] todd_bonzalez@lemm.ee 63 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago)

I don't care if they were fucking the burgers and shakes, the employees can ask them to leave if they're violating the business' code of conduct, and after that they can call the police if they're trespassing.

The customer can sue the shit out of them after the fact if it was discriminatory, and in D.C. that would be a slam dunk if they were just kissing.

Once the employees decided to resort to violence, they fucked up, regardless of what the customers were doing.

Either way, you weren't there, and homophobes blow up about pretty mundane things all the time, so maybe just take the gay men at their word instead of accusing them of inappropriate behavior and revealing yourself to be a homophobe yourself.

[-] kryptonianCodeMonkey@lemmy.world 13 points 2 months ago

I read his words. It was his words that made me doubt. He and his partner were the victims here, for sure. But that doesn't mean that they are being honest about the preamble to the altercation. But if not fully believing a person about every single detail of their story, if not taking every single assumption that they made as gospel makes me homophobe because they happen to be gay, sure. Whatever.

[-] finley@lemm.ee 37 points 2 months ago

But that doesn’t mean that they are being honest about the preamble to the altercation.

YOU, again, are the only one implying this, without evidence. And you're clearly doing it to excuse the bigotry and violence they faced.

[-] kryptonianCodeMonkey@lemmy.world 15 points 2 months ago

I didn't say I had evidence. I said I got a feeling from the way he phrased his story. I also said I might be wrong.

[-] finley@lemm.ee 25 points 2 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago)

yet, oddly, you keep asserting - without evidence - that the victims are liars and the bigotry and violence they received was justified.

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[-] Samvega 24 points 2 months ago

I said I got a feeling from the way he phrased his story.

"From the way you phrase your posts, I guess you might have disturbing images on your hard drive. I might be wrong."

Would you take offence if I said that? If yes, then think about what you're doing.

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[-] Samvega 45 points 2 months ago

There is never a reason for either party to escalate a verbal disagreement to a physical one, but...

You modify a 'never' with a comma and a 'but'. So, not 'never'.

PDA were as innocent as they imply it

"They kissed in a non-innocent way and I had to assault them."
Hmm, that sounds like bullshit to me.

[-] kryptonianCodeMonkey@lemmy.world 13 points 2 months ago

First of all, the word "but" doesn't negate the statement in the first half of the sentence. "I wanted ice cream, but I ate a donut instead" doesn't mean I never wanted ice cream. The but, in this case was meant to indicate that, while I am on their side in regard to the violence that occurred becuase it was unjustifiable regardless of what started the interaction, I would not be surprised to find put that he downplayed that detail and the employee may have been justified in asking them to stop. Him downplaying that detail, and/or the employee being justified in asking them to stop does not, in an way shape for form, excuse, defend, or approve the violence that followed. That was the exact reason I prefaced that statement with the fact that the physical violence wasn't acceptable here.

[-] finley@lemm.ee 26 points 2 months ago

First of all, the word “but” doesn’t negate the statement in the first half of the sentence.

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[-] Samvega 24 points 2 months ago

The but, in this case was meant to indicate that, while I am on their side in regard to the violence that occurred becuase it was unjustifiable regardless of what started the interaction, I would not be surprised to find put that he downplayed that detail...

It's 'unjustifiable'. So why link that to assuming the victim was obfuscating the truth? In the same sentence, you are absolving the victim of blame while also claiming that they lied.

[-] kryptonianCodeMonkey@lemmy.world 12 points 2 months ago

Because I was prefacing my statement in an attempt to ward off misunderstandings about whose side I was on. I underestimated the degree to which people lack a sense of nuance apparently, though

[-] Samvega 19 points 2 months ago

What 'nuance' is there about speculating that two assaulted gay people were kissing harder than they described?

As you yourself say, it does not have any bearing on the violence done to them being acceptable. So why link those two things together with a comma but?

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[-] coffeecoffeecoffee89@lemmy.world 30 points 2 months ago

Dude, you are wrong. Give it up. No guy has ever had the shit beat out of him by a stores employees for straight PDA. This was homophobia, and your bullshit argument just invalidates the very real struggle gay people go through every day. You are clearly not gay. So learn when you don't have the context to speak up, accept you are wrong, and sit the hell down.

[-] Samvega 20 points 2 months ago

No guy has ever had the shit beat out of him by a stores employees for straight PDA.

I've certainly not heard of a hetero couple being assaulted for kissing. Unless they were seen to be of different ethnic heritages or religions.

How I've seen people deal with seeing kissing they don't want to see: "Stop that and leave."

How I've seen people deal with their bigotry being triggered: escalating violence.

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[-] FlyingSquid@lemmy.world 29 points 2 months ago

There are always two sides to every altercation

Yes, and in this case it was the side that violently beat a man for an event which started with their queerphobia and the other side that didn't violently beat a man for any reason.

[-] Valmond@lemmy.world 26 points 2 months ago

You think a lot about that gay kissing don't you now.

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[-] Vespair@lemm.ee 18 points 2 months ago

Even a full-on gay orgy in the dead center of the restaurant is no excuse for violence.

But beyond that, people who are bothered by PDA are so fucking lame. You really want a sterile, sexless world devoid of passion and expressions of love? I think that sounds so fucking miserable

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[-] ImADifferentBird 16 points 2 months ago

You should have stopped after the first sentence.

I don't fucking care if they were in spit-swapping makeout mode, they did nothing wrong.

[-] catloaf@lemm.ee 12 points 2 months ago

It's saddening to me that the take of "there's probably more to the story here" is so objectionable. Judgment absolutely should be withheld pending investigation.

[-] EleventhHour@lemmy.world 14 points 2 months ago

Making up stories just so someone can blame the victims is generally not well received here.

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[-] coffeecoffeecoffee89@lemmy.world 12 points 2 months ago

It saddening to me to see someone put in the hospital because they kissed their partner. It's even more saddening that assholes like you want to invalidate that experience with your baseless doubt.

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this post was submitted on 19 Aug 2024
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