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Sick burn
(slrpnk.net)
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this post was submitted on 11 Aug 2024
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I've never heard this guy talk so hearing his voice...
I mean, I'm not saying that I've ever talked to a couch fucker but....yeah, the voice sort of says couch fucker.
There’s a reason that rumor spread so effectively
The author of the tweet never even tried to claim it was true, either. When the couch thing blew up, they even specifically said that it was just a joke. You’re exactly right, though. There’s just something about Vance that makes it seem believable.
Well, if you've read any of his Hillbilly Elegy, it fits. He does this weird oscillation where he talks about his humble roots, and then is incredibly condescending towards anyone in a similar situation.
Apparently he's better than that now.
He could talk about how he was so desperate he fucked his couch. But then, once he had money, he was able to attract an actual woman. He still occasionally fucks a couch, just for nostalgia, but all those other people who are still fucking couches are sad and gross.
It would blend right in.
I dunno about couches but my gaydar went nuclear at that clip.
But of course, he can't be gay, because he didn't want to suck dicks at the age of 8.