I discovered the origin of the problem Not on my own but through a couple that treats different addictions They were incapie that the origin of the problem was a heteropatriarchal conditioning At first I thought it was nonsense but I let it go since I had tried everything with no results I went to church, self-help, cold showers... It was a long road but this is the first thing that really works It's not a day counter, it's that I am free