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submitted 10 months ago* (last edited 10 months ago) by Shampoo_Bottle@lemmy.ca to c/asklemmy@lemmy.ml

Up until I started working, I didn't really encounter that question. When I did start working, people started asking me that question.

Them: Where are you from?

Me: Canada.

Them: Where are your grandparents from?

Me: Canada.

Them: Ok, where are your great grandparents from?

Me: Canada.

It's irritating sometimes. I just want to exist, do my job and go home, like anyone else. Once is ok, twice is odd, three times is weird, and the fourth time is a pattern.

The only accent that I might have would probably be from Newfoundland, Canada, as I grew up with a lot of people from there. I also talk too fast sometimes.

Have you had similar experiences, and if so, how did you handle it? Can fast speech patterns cause this? Why do random people care so much?

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[-] shinigamiookamiryuu@lemm.ee 5 points 10 months ago

I have a classic NZ voice as well as a tan and get asked this often because I'm in the most Caucasian place outside of Europe (I'll let you guess). Half the time they don't even assume where I'm from because they don't have enough education about the world to hold any stereotypes about me (which makes them draw a blank about countries), which ironically gives me the freedom to respond however I want.

[-] mannycalavera@feddit.uk 2 points 10 months ago

because I'm in the most Caucasian place outside of Europe (I'll let you guess)

🤔

Israel?

[-] shinigamiookamiryuu@lemm.ee 1 points 10 months ago

No, thankfully. I thought the boundaries of Europe extended further East than Israel.

[-] MadBob@feddit.nl 2 points 10 months ago

the most Caucasian place outside of Europe (I’ll let you guess)

Georgia!

[-] shinigamiookamiryuu@lemm.ee 1 points 10 months ago

They're in Europe though.

[-] mirtuevagnet@lemmy.world 2 points 10 months ago

A lack of education on a certain accent and/or look might also trigger honest curiosity in people, as opposed to racism. But I guess the way people ask you background questions reveal their agenda.

[-] shinigamiookamiryuu@lemm.ee 2 points 10 months ago

Yes and no. They have a highly exclusive mindset, insisting people with their roots here going generations back are priority number one and newcomers like me are priority number two, but no, they're not outright racist or hostile or anything, just by far not welcoming. Though that itself isn't the best thing in the world. Last year was a huge year for natural disasters and they only worried about me after I had survived, not while I was trying to survive, perhaps because to them I'm a stock human who "asked for the life".

[-] ArtieShaw@kbin.social 3 points 10 months ago

Do you have an unusual or oddly spelled surname?

I do. It's by marriage, and coworkers sometimes awkwardly ask about it. It won't be the first question they ask - because that would be weird, but it often comes up if it sort of fits the conversation.

[-] simple@lemm.ee 3 points 10 months ago

I was actually in a similar situation where I wasn't too good with my native tongue so people would constantly ask where I'm from. It's not malicious, people just assume you're not from here if your accent is different.

[-] Drusas@kbin.social 3 points 10 months ago

Your native tongue is the one you grew up speaking. This isn't always the same as the language predominantly spoken by your ancestors.

[-] simple@lemm.ee 2 points 10 months ago

I did grow up speaking it, I'm just better with my 2nd language.

[-] ULS@lemmy.ml 3 points 10 months ago

Are you still in Canada. If you're in America it's probably because people are looking for something to hate you for.

[-] Zahille7@lemmy.world 1 points 10 months ago

Way to generalize, dumbass.

[-] ULS@lemmy.ml 1 points 10 months ago* (last edited 10 months ago)
[-] ReallyKinda@kbin.social 3 points 10 months ago

What kind of job?

People ask me where I’m from a lot because they can’t place my accent, but I don’t think it’s different at work than elsewhere.

I worked a phone line for awhile and people asked where I was from sometimes, but not the whole grandparents spiel.

[-] Resol@lemmy.world 2 points 10 months ago

Time to ask a different question.

Where am I from? No hints.

[-] catastrophicblues@lemmy.ca 1 points 10 months ago

I never know how to answer this. I grew up till middle school in Canada and the rest of my school in India. I rarely get dentist with many Indian traditions, but I also didn’t spend enough time in Canada to be a “real” Canadian.

I just flip a coin in my head and answer each time. And then get the follow-up asking where my parents are from. Just ask my race, you coward.

[-] Shampoo_Bottle@lemmy.ca 1 points 10 months ago

What IS a real Canadian, though? I know some immigrants who love this country much more than some of the people who were born here.

Many of us are also only here from our ancestors immigrating. How far down the line does one have to be to be a real Canadian? You can't judge that by DNA, either.

[-] RBWells@lemmy.world 1 points 10 months ago

Oh my goodness. I am pretty much garden variety white, fair skin, blue eyes, dark hair, but mom's dad was half native American or Mexican (such a brutal upbringing he never talked about them so she didn't know for sure beyond "Oklahoma"), she looked more native in features, I got some of that and what I got asked down here when young is "what are you?"

It may be your accent but maybe it's your looks. I think just responding, "Canada, what about you?" is correct.

As to why people care, I don't rightly know. Maybe they think you might like to talk about it, or like to put people in boxes or don't know you and are trying awkwardly to make small talk.

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this post was submitted on 20 Jan 2024
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