My ass is now on the ground instead of a chair, ow

Ow!

I have either bisected the wall, or the wall has bisected me.

My left arm is now part of the wall, so at least I didn't die outright.

My husband is very happy, but he also dies (in his video game)

I find myself sitting inside the end table next to the sofa, instantly destroying it along with a lamp a ukulele, and several glasses I haven't taken to the sink yet

I am now sitting in a different chair at the same table. I continue browsing Lemmy on my phone.

I am now sitting on the laptop my company gave for work, most likely breaking it. Which is unfortunate, but I can probably just request another.

I'm now outside the train going 200km/h and have a nice, hard and long fall in half a second to look forward to.

Inside a decorated Christmas tree. Maybe I can blame the cat for all the glass bulbs I'd break?

I'm taking a shit in my bathroom cabinet now.

My cat Ralph is not gonna be happy about that.

I'm pooping. Two feet to my left is a wall. I'd be inside the wall D:

Whose left? If I'm lying on my left side do I go straight down?

I instantly swapped chair in the dining room.

I'm still on the couch, slightly further away from my wife.

I die with my body stuck in the foundation. Now my house is gonna be all stinky >:(

Dead. I'm laying on my left side.

Very uncomfortable. You've pulled me off my bed and now I'm laying naked on my power inverter.

Two very pissed off cats.

I have a bag of Skippy Peanut Butter Balls lodged in my ass. If I move they won't be there any more ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

I'm laying on my side in bed, so.... I guess I jump two feet in the air, fall, make a big sound, probally bounce off and break some stuff and then have back problems all day.

Fuck, I'm merged with the side of the sofa, and my cat's ass sticks out of my chest. I don't care already though, she mixed with my heart and lungs.

I am now a propane stove/human hybrid.

15 stories high in the air over a concrete street.

I'm in a sitting position, one foot beyond my desk, with my feet about 10 inches off the ground, and my butt is about 16 inches off the ground. I fall on my ass comedically, amidst loud cursing.

I now have to crawl back onto my couch. And I'm cold now too.

I'm on the bathroom floor with my pants around my ankles

I am now inside my desk. I die a slow and painful death.

I'd be on the floor. Which is a problem because I have a broken ankle/leg and can't put weight on it for another week.

My head is now clipping through a cardboard box full of stuff. I assume that wouldn't be very survivable.

I fall to the floor and possibly hit my head on a table on the way down.

I've clipped into a pool table.

I just took my evening shit on the floor of my bathroom, which is unfortunate.

You just discovered the tensile strength of the color green is umpity dumpity 400. How does that make your left nut feel?

That's how utterly asinine these kinds of queries are.