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Anon orders food (sh.itjust.works)
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[-] TheFerrango@feddit.it 75 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago)

Pizza shop is 4 minutes away

Orders delivery

Joke’s on OP

[-] nullspace@lemmy.world 43 points 2 weeks ago

Ordering a personal taxi for your food instead of walking a few blocks is peak American.

[-] abysmalpoptart@lemmy.world 34 points 2 weeks ago

To be fair, typically in America (outside of major cities and certain planned neighborhoods), 4 minutes away implies by car. Even if driving only 20mph (unlikely), the pizza shop would be a minimum 1.3 miles away, which would be more like a 30+ minute walk for a pizza.

On top of that, there's almost no safe walking paths by design. You would likely have to traverse major roads with no sidewalks, crosswalks, or even pedestrian stop lights.

It's an unfortunate design that many are stuck with.

[-] HCSOThrowaway@lemmy.world 21 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago)

Unironically, yes.

It doesn't occur to most Americans to walk a bit instead of drive.

This is exacerbated by the design of American neighborhoods that discourages walking and encourages driving, which of course becomes a feedback loop where Americans don't walk because their neighborhoods aren't designed for it - or worse - designed against it, and so our neighborhoods are designed for people who don't walk, etc.

[-] LodeMike@lemmy.today 5 points 2 weeks ago
[-] AnUnusualRelic@lemmy.world 7 points 2 weeks ago

You walk at a brisk pace!

[-] lessthanluigi@lemmy.sdf.org 1 points 2 weeks ago

Walking 30mph

[-] dil@piefed.zip 3 points 2 weeks ago

It was cheaper and faster to doordash a restaurant quite literally across the street in college, I tested it a few times when my friends would go to buy food there and mine would come like 10 minutes before they got back. Literally across the street, like a 1 minute walk max.

[-] some_kind_of_guy@lemmy.world 5 points 2 weeks ago

That sounds like the before days. These days, they profit the fuck out of us. Kids in college now know no different. Fuck these types of businesses

[-] arctanthrope@lemmy.world 75 points 3 weeks ago

if an 8 minute round trip saves you $15, then you're essentially paying yourself $112.50/hr to be your own delivery driver

[-] Alcoholicorn@mander.xyz 29 points 3 weeks ago

And yet the delivery driver makes fuckall.

[-] jballs@sh.itjust.works 14 points 2 weeks ago

That's the part that's criminal about delivery fees not going to the driver. My nephew used to deliver for a pizza place but then switched to Uber Eats after his pizza company outsourced and fired all the drivers.

People place orders and see that they're paying a delivery fee, a service fee, and a higher menu price than ordering in the store and then think that they don't need to tip much (if anything) because surely that money is going to the driver doing the actual work and deliverying the food.

But nope, the driver gets paid very little for taking an order. The tip is the vast majority of their salary. My nephew will show me screenshots of orders that he gets that will be like "drive 10 miles to pickup the order, then 5 miles to picked the second piece of the order, then 10 miles to deliver it - for $2.00."

What's worse is that since companies have figured out they can hide this from consumers and get away with it, they've expanded to stuff like "same day delivery" from retail stores. Customers think "same day delivery" is the equivalent to an item being shipped, so would never consider tipping. But it turns out those services are also going through delivery drivers like Uber Eats, meaning someone will pick up a retail order in their own car and get paid next to nothing without tips (which most people don't even think to pay).

Tipping in lieu of salary is a scam.

[-] Ice@lemmy.zip 15 points 3 weeks ago

Yeah that's some pretty insane cost/benefit for time.

It's one of those things I like doing to encourage myself to do things. "OK so if I do this thing by myself, what am I 'getting paid'?"

...and then I compare that to the number of hours I'd have to work to earn the same amount of money (after taxes).

That's something my father taught me. Always consider what your time is worth. Invest 2 hours just to save 8 Euro? Not a great deal for most people.

[-] daggermoon@piefed.world 34 points 3 weeks ago

If it's 4 minutes away why not walk? The fuck?

[-] Zorcron@lemmy.zip 53 points 3 weeks ago

They probably mean a 4 minute drive, which would be like a 30 minute walk, assuming you can cross the 6-lane monstrosity of a road that the pizza place is on without being smushed by a lifted F-250.

[-] altkey@lemmy.dbzer0.com 5 points 3 weeks ago

Or half a mile if you have a couple junctions with red lights ahead, like around the block. Anon could've been living in a flat over said pizza joint for all we know. Or they are just a liar, who also have a crush on delivery driver, so they order pizza to see them again.

[-] Lodespawn@aussie.zone 18 points 3 weeks ago* (last edited 3 weeks ago)

I assume op just burned and extra $5 for fun as part of this whole interaction..

[-] SubArcticTundra@lemmy.ml 7 points 3 weeks ago
[-] Rawrosaurus@lemmy.dbzer0.com 3 points 3 weeks ago* (last edited 3 weeks ago)

Is that not already included in the price in the US? I don't live in the US, this is a genuine question.

[-] vaionko@sopuli.xyz 2 points 2 weeks ago

I think not, even the prices in grocery store don't include VAT. It seems absurd to me

[-] sepiroth154@feddit.nl 4 points 3 weeks ago

He used coins as extra topping.

[-] Bad_Ideas_In_Bulk@lemmy.world 16 points 3 weeks ago

While there is nutrition value to some bugs, most grasses pass undigested through the human gut. We are not ruminants Also if you leave bugs for a chicken to eat, you can have eggs instead.

[-] protist@retrofed.com 15 points 2 weeks ago

$10 + $7 + $2 or $3 = $19 or $20. Sales tax would be less than a dollar. Anon's unhealthy lifestyle is causing cognitive decline

[-] tmyakal@infosec.pub 10 points 2 weeks ago

sales tax would be less than a dollar

Entirely locality dependent. Where I live, tax on a $20 tab would be a little under $2. I know there's some municipalities where it'd be as high as $2.40.

So, sure, technically still not $25, but once you need more than a $20 bill, it's not obscene to round up to the nearest $5.

[-] protist@retrofed.com 4 points 2 weeks ago

Where I'm at, I'm pretty sure sales taxes aren't assessed on the fees, only on the product

[-] bequirtle@lemmy.world 6 points 2 weeks ago

you see, the delivery fee is $7, but then you also have to pay $5 in "other fees", whatever that means

[-] Whats_your_reasoning@lemmy.world 2 points 2 weeks ago

Probably an “online convenience fee,” as if it’s more work to have an order print up at the restaurant than to make someone there take a phone call.

[-] SkunkWorkz@lemmy.world 12 points 2 weeks ago

Many Americans don’t have healthy grass if they have grass in the first place. In many places in the US keeping a pristine grass yard requires a shit ton of human intervention, which means fertilizers and a ton of chemicals. Since grass isn’t native to those areas.

[-] HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world 3 points 2 weeks ago

where isn't grass native? are you referring specifically to their lawns? because like, even our deserts here have grass.

[-] SkunkWorkz@lemmy.world 3 points 2 weeks ago

Yeah I mean lawn grass. Most people don’t use native species.

[-] UltraGiGaGigantic@lemmy.ml 7 points 3 weeks ago* (last edited 3 weeks ago)
[-] moopet@sh.itjust.works 7 points 2 weeks ago

This post has literally inspired me to order a pizza for my lunch today rather than open the fridge.

[-] DonkeyStar@lemmy.world 4 points 3 weeks ago

One of the food delivery apps labeled something “long distance delivery” at five miles. I could walk that. I didn’t, but I certainly didn’t pay someone else to drive it.

[-] Mwa@thelemmy.club 3 points 2 weeks ago

There are delivery apps the delivery Fee is lower based on how near the restaurant is.

[-] HeyThisIsntTheYMCA@lemmy.world 2 points 2 weeks ago

i mean you joke but fried cicadas aren't half bad

this post was submitted on 30 Jul 2026
427 points (100.0% liked)

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