"A Florida woman has been accused of entering the penguin enclosure to teach them to tap dance, using a live alligator as her partner."

"In the beginning, the universe was created. This has made a lot of people very unhappy and has been widely regarded as a bad move."

"This too shall pass"

If something good happens, it's a cautionary warning to stay humble.

If something bad happens, it's a comforting reminder that things will get better.

Time flies like an arrow, fruit flies like a banana.

Buffalo buffalo Buffalo buffalo buffalo buffalo Buffalo buffalo

They don't think it be like it is, but it do.

The chinese poem "The Story of Mr. Shi Eating Lions"

Shíshì shī shì shǐ shì, shì shǐ, shī shì, shì shí shí shī. Shī sì shì shī. Shǐ shì shè sì, shì shī shì, shǐ shī shì shí shī shī, shì shí shí, shǐ shí shìshì. Shǐ shǐ shì shì shì shì, shì shī shì. Shì shì shì shì.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lion-Eating_Poet_in_the_Stone_Den

"In the beginning the universe was created. This has made a lot of people very angry and has been widely regarded as a bad move".

"I look both ways when I cross a one way street, because that's how much faith I have in humanity."

"That's one of the remarkable things about life. It's never so bad that it can't get worse"

Calvin of Calvin and Hobbes

"Do you think... God stays in heaven because he, too, lives in fear of what he's created, here on Earth? "

Dr Romero, Spy Kids 2: The Island of Lost Dreams, written by Robert Rodriguez.

People don’t think it be like it is, but it do

Some motherfuckers are always trying to ice skate uphill.

Tiān gāo, huángdì yuǎn
Heaven is high and the emperor is far away

Is one of my favorite.

Another is the a misattributed quote:

Les hommes ne seront jamais libres tant que le dernier roi ne sera pas étranglé avec les entrailles du dernier prêtre.

Men will never be free until the last king is strangled with the entrails of the last priest.

Though the apparent original is good too.

Je ne veux ni donner ni recevoir de lois.
Et ses mains ourdiraient les entrailles du prêtre,
Au défaut d'un cordon pour étrangler les rois.

I seek neither to rule nor to serve.
And its hands would weave the entrails of the priest,
For the lack of a cord with which to strangle kings.

The second line from the US declaration of indpenedce is a banger too:

We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness.

John Brown's:

I cannot remember a night so dark as to have hindered the coming day.

Is also really good.

"Black Friday Sale! This Thursday only!".

Despite all our accomplishments, we all own our existence to a 6 inch layer of topsoil and the fact that it rains.

I found it somewere on the Internet and can Not forget it.

"It was the best of times, it was the blurst of times...stupid monkey!"

This isn't the greatest sentence, this is just a tribute.

You have nothing to loose but your chains

"The man in black fled into the desert, and the gunslinger followed"

• opening line for the Dark Tower novels by Stephen King, which is an absolutely phenomenal series that blends western and sci-fi elements with just a tad of fantasy and horror for flavor.

"He who fights monsters must see that he doesn't become a monster himself. For when you stare into the abyss, the abyss stares back at you."

Friedrich Nietzsche

It's over 9000!

The cost of living is dying, and everyone pays.

*Pray, Mr. Babbage, if you put into the machine wrong figures, will the right answers come out?"

I think we are at that point again but with “AI”.

love that with such a broad sample pool, what we get here are some quips, in English, from the last few decades

If you're gonna be stupid, be smart about it.

"Money can't buy happiness, but it's better to cry in a taxi than on a bus." - Marcel Reich-Ranicki (German literary critic)

I changed the last word in the translation to bus for the US readers. It should be tram or streetcar but I assumed bus is more common and widely known.

“Let every dirty, lousy tramp arm himself with a revolver or a knife, and lay in wait on the steps of the palaces of the rich and stab or shoot the owners as they come out.”

- Lucy Parsons

Be good...or be good at it.

Mrs. Higgins’ body was found in the pantry, bludgeoned with a potato ricer and lying atop a fifty-pound sack of Yukon golds, her favorite for making gnocchi, though some people consider them too moist for this purpose.

-Joel Phillips

https://www.bulwer-lytton.com/about

“ The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood; who strives valiantly; who errs, who comes short again and again, because there is no effort without error and shortcoming; but who does actually strive to do the deeds; who knows great enthusiasms, the great devotions; who spends himself in a worthy cause; who at the best knows in the end the triumph of high achievement, and who at the worst, if he fails, at least fails while daring greatly, so that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who neither know victory nor defeat.” -Teddy Roosevelt

Hand me that piano.

"Welcome to Costco, I love you"

All those moments will be lost in time, like tears in rain.

The problem is, or rather one of the problems, for there are many, a sizeable proportion of which are continually clogging up the civil, commercial, and criminal courts in all areas of the Galaxy, and especially, where possible, the more corrupt ones, this.

Some mornings, it's just not worth chewing through the leather straps.