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Blunt but true
(lemmy.world)
Chloe isn't that into you, take. The. Hint.
I got matched with a girl on Tinder and I started the convo. All I got were one line answers like "yup", "nope", "haha". Then we matched again on a different dating app. I chatted to her again but she never responded.
I get that dating apps can be daunting for many people, but we matched twice so clearly we are into each other. But really, make more effort than just giving one line responses or being matched again and not replying. That experience was more annoying than being ghosted or never getting any matches at all.
Tbh I would attribute this to someone just having poor literacy. Many people have a surprisingly serious struggle with reading or writing. If you ever have had to listen to an adult read something aloud, when they aren't someone who does a lot of reading for work? Slow, choppy, awkward, wrong inflection. You can tell they're literally taking it one word at a time, they aren't scanning the sentence ahead while reading. They do it word by word, storing each word in their mental RAM, and then discover the meaning of the sentence only at the end by reviewing that buffer. Then they pause as they internalize it and repeat the process. It's an exquisitely painful thing to watch. A LOT more people read like this than literate people think.
I mean, it's good to find that out before you let somebody like that in your life, that comes with all kinds of financial and legal risks.
'You're not getting good matches because people are illiterate.' Has to be a new one. Maybe. But also take a look at yourself and your conversation skills. Maybe everyone is illiterate, or maybe that person wasn't that into you, or maybe you're not that interesting to talk to, or maybe it should wasn't a good day for them.
But nah. It must be everyone is illiterate.
Yeah there are definitely many, many other reasons for someone giving curt responses. But if they've signaled that they're into you, and still talk that way, I would suspect that they may just be a bad communicator. But yes lol I definitely don't want to make it sound like the conversation in the OP is about the person being illiterate. Indeed, the OP image clearly reads to me as Chloe just being busy or uninterested, or many other explanations (but not being a spoiled evil bitch as so many commenters here seem desperate to find reasons for)
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but over half of American adults can't read above middle school level.
reading out loud is different though, I read pretty fast normally but when I have to read out loud I feel like I have to slow down my reading to match my speaking leading to me skipping/rereading words
The genuine advice I can give around this to you, or anyone else reading this is to read this for what it is. She may be busy, if she's interested, she'll message later. But it is also very possible she just wants someone to give her attention, and beating yourself up over someone being inconsiderate towards you. If she's interested, she'll talk, fighting or begging for someone who won't fight back for you isn't taking care of yourself.
Oh yeah, I am not beating myself for it. I know it's on her. There are plenty of fishes in the sea, but some folks hold on to one person they barely even know. I have chatted and dated other girls after and had better time. I just thought it was a weird encounter and explained to the person I replied to, that the one word/line responses are genuinely irritating regardless of whatever reasons as to why the person was doing it.
Yeah, no, you’re absolutely right. It’s ok to just complain that people don’t reciprocate in a discussion. It’s annoying and when I’m dictator, it will be punishable by fine or imprisonment.
yup
If this is tinder or similar, she should unmatch.
If it's just regular messaging, yeah the guy should back off.
Also she's working! And it sounds like she works at a restaurant. Like, oh sorry let me just stop bussing these tables for a second to talk to this smartass I barely know and maybe get fired?
Then, say so. “Hey, I'm working. I really want to chat up with you but I'm currently busy. I'll hit you up during my break.”
There, crisis adverted by the power of actually being communicative.
Am I missing something? Why would she need to reply immediately? Can't she just wait until she's off the clock?
depends if the platform has read receipts
But what if, because I'm working, I don't have time to type all that out? But rather than completely ignoring the message, I try to give what answer I can? Have you never worked a job busy enough that you don't have time to send full sentence texts? In the food industry it's quite common, especially if she actually works on the kitchen staff.
Also, the crisis could also be averted by the other person not feeling entitled to getting "good enough" responses. Do you owe people a response that is up to their standards? Certainly not when you're so unfamiliar with someone that they don't even know what job you do. To my friends or family, sure...but I would also expect them to understand me giving out curt messages if I'm busy too.
That's a poor strategy. The other person is going to think you're bad at communicating (because you are, at least in that moment). These chats are asynchronous. Respond when you have time, optionally indicating that you don't have time right now.
The other person doesn't know you. This is their entire impression. Why would you make it a half-assed one?
Sorry. Working.
I mean, this proves nothing to me because I find this a perfectly acceptable response lol
"Sorry, working" is a completely acceptable response. It sets up the idea that you're still interested in communicating, but can't right now.
If you don't have time to make a quick message like that, then don't answer right now. Wait until you're on break or off work and then pick up the conversation. An answer that raises more questions than it answers is just frustrating for all parties involved, you included since you get more questions :P
(Realized while looking at this that it sounds like I'm addressing this to you specifically. I'm not. I'm just sharing my thoughts on how to communicate that one's at work in general, so sorry if it comes across as accusatory)
There was nothing to indicate she was working. He was asking what she was doing on Fraser Island, not what she was doing right then.
If she talks like this, walk away, she's not looking for personality and isn't worth the effort.
Food and beverage for thought, babe.
Bro can't take a hint. Do yourself a favor and don't insist on talking to someone who isn't as excited to talk to you as you are with them.
There's a big "unmatch" button. In real life, sure, you can give curt responses to try to signal that you're not interested. That doesn't translate to the app. Hit unmatch and they vanish. There's no good reason to dead-end the conversation on tinder.
Alternatively, be an adult and tell someone when you're not interested. Some of us don't get cues like this. I'd argue most men aren't able to pick up on basic cues given how many stories there are out there of dudes not being aware they were being flirted with in the most obvious situations.
People don't owe you explanations of their choices. If literal silence is not enough of a hint, why keep pushing? That's on them. They are making the choice to keep going. Why is the other person responsible for that choice?
They are choosing to listen to their own neediness rather than facing what's right there. And that is a short, uninterested response.
Because not everyone is able to get those hints. I literally just said this.
If you're being a dick to everyone while showing zero interest, you do not get to whine about how you are treated. It is as simple as that. You are treated by how you behave and this behavior is shitty so it's treated shitty. No. There isn't an excuse that will allow someone to get away with this behavior fully and without crticisim, no matter how hard you try. People are responsible for that actions.
You literally repeated what I said. Yes, I agree. You are responsible for what you say. If you keep talking to someone, you are responsible for making that choice.
Ok, you didn't get the message the first time. Now you had a learning opportunity, if you choose not to use it and instead blame it on the other person, that's on you.
"Don't talk to someone that isn't taking back to you." Isn't a secret skill gifted to a chosen few. It's a learned skill, that everyone has to learn.
This isn't even "taking a hint", it's just logic. Don't eat pepper if you discover you don't like spice.
If instead of learning, you choose to blame the other person. You're using the other person as an excuse to not take responsibility or expecting something you have no entitlement to (their attention).
Yeah, because telling someone you're not interested can't go wrong either. Some dudes flip their shit, she gets a pass.
That doesn't really apply to dating apps. The whole profile vanishes when someone unmatches you.
Nope.
It's called K'gari
Okay
I don't who that is but it looks like we'd get along. lol
Rekt
this post was submitted on 22 Aug 2025
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