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[-] jaupsinluggies@feddit.uk 3 points 1 day ago

Oh I thought this was another article about that big orange crybaby in Moronica.

[-] Venus_Ziegenfalle@feddit.org 16 points 1 day ago

There's an easy way to test her true age. Everybody knows the millenial can't resist the avocado toast.

[-] SPRUNT@lemmy.world 8 points 1 day ago

I thought you were going to suggest cutting in half and Counting the rings.

Yet another good reason to bring back the guillotine

[-] mitch@piefed.mitch.science 9 points 1 day ago

hey, this is the plot of Children of Men...

Frozen in 1994? Surprised the headline wasn’t: “Millennials are Getting Born Later Than Any Generation in History”

[-] SharkAttak@kbin.melroy.org 2 points 1 day ago

Can you blame them, really? Looking at the state of gestures vaguely around...

[-] N0t_5ure@lemmy.world 91 points 2 days ago

I thought the world's oldest baby was elected president?

[-] tryitout@infosec.pub 49 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago)

Instead, she opted for "embryo adoption", which allowed her to have a say in the future parents - with the process overseen by a religious agency.

Nightlight Christian Adoptions took on the embryos and placed them with Lindsey and Tim Pierce.

They fitted Linda's criteria of a married, Caucasian Christian couple...

How lovely

[-] SkyezOpen@lemmy.world 32 points 1 day ago

Buying frozen babies, just as God intended.

[-] FuglyDuck@lemmy.world 18 points 1 day ago

Frozen can be fresher than “fresh” because it’s frozen at the optimal freshness rather than picked early and shipped, sitting on shelves for six months.

It’s also less expensive than using fresh babies for the blood sacrifice.

[-] SkyezOpen@lemmy.world 1 points 1 day ago

Yeah but you ever try to stab a frozen baby with a ritual knife? Such a pain.

Would you prefer they not make this logical compromise between their faith and people's needs?

[-] SkyezOpen@lemmy.world 3 points 1 day ago

Whose needs?

[-] salty_chief@lemmy.world 56 points 2 days ago

Baby in 2040 at age 15. “You mean I could have been born in 1995!? I could have at least enjoyed some of the early 2000s!

[-] mitch@piefed.mitch.science 7 points 1 day ago

oldest baby: "I was totally born in the wrong generation."

[-] someguy3@lemmy.world 26 points 2 days ago* (last edited 2 days ago)
  1. The peak of our civilization.
[-] mitch@piefed.mitch.science 3 points 1 day ago

fun fact, the years 1999, 2000, and 2001 were actually all the same year.

[-] BeMoreCareful@lemmy.world 4 points 1 day ago

Too bad those sliding phones never really caught on

[-] Couldbealeotard@lemmy.world 4 points 1 day ago

They were actually produced and sold, but apparently the sliding mechanism would break with wear and tear.

[-] Semi_Hemi_Demigod@lemmy.world 74 points 2 days ago

So by Republican logic that baby can vote

[-] vivalapivo@lemmy.today 45 points 2 days ago* (last edited 2 days ago)

Nono, this baby can fuck (by republican logic)

[-] Susaga@sh.itjust.works 30 points 2 days ago

Considering the guy leading the Republicans, I feel like they would say that about ALL babies.

[-] P00ptart@lemmy.world 8 points 1 day ago

There's a lot of heavy lifting by a lot of words in there. Saying the baby has a "biological sister" is at best a half truth and more like a total falsehood. I have a half sister out there somewhere that was adopted away that I've never met. And that's far more close than this scenario.

[-] Neuromancer49@midwest.social 12 points 1 day ago

Personally, I disagree. The baby's bio sister is, literally, a biological sister whose DNA comes from the same parents.

[-] P00ptart@lemmy.world 1 points 1 day ago

Only the egg. And that egg went in a different mother, and was inseminated by a different father. I'm not a biologist but I feel like the mother who bore the baby also contributed some amount of DNA. It's like when someone gets a heart or liver transplant, they often change their personality a bit. I read about a guy who got a heart transplant from a guy who died rock climbing, and suddenly got big into fitness, art and his taste in music changed.

[-] Neuromancer49@midwest.social 7 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago)

Actually, no, the bio soster shares the same biological father. This was an embryo adoption, not IVF

[-] P00ptart@lemmy.world 2 points 1 day ago

Ohhhh ok, my bad. I must've misread some of that after being grossed out by the whole religious bullshit being a part of it.

[-] Ilovethebomb@sh.itjust.works 19 points 2 days ago

This headline is absolutely perfect for this community.

[-] Sterile_Technique@lemmy.world 10 points 1 day ago* (last edited 1 day ago)

Frozen embryo. Meh.

I thought this was about extended gestation at first, which is something I've always wondered about: is the whole 9-months thing driven by the baby or the mother? Or more specifically, is 9 months the optimal amount of time for a baby to be in the womb?

Like if we manipulated the hormones / blocked the whole pressure-oxytocin feedback loop on the maternal side to just keep the mother gestating for... 12 months? 15? 3 years?? Would the 'newborn toddler' have a hyper-developed brain? Or just a normal brain that lost out on the first 3 years of critical life experience?

If our incubation tech was good enough to fully replace a biological mother... 20 years? ...there's a dystopian sci-fi writing prompt for ya. ...or like, the key to super humans.

Or, would shit like the foramen ovale on the fetal side of things just close off anyway and put it into a birth-now-or-die situation?

[-] Neuromancer49@midwest.social 4 points 1 day ago

The limiting factor in utero is the health of the placenta. Past a certain point, the organ no longer functions and the baby does not survive. This is why (at least in the US) inductions are required past a certain point.

https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC9320537/

[-] Sterile_Technique@lemmy.world 1 points 1 day ago

Hadn't even considered that - I figured it came down to size constraints or the anatomic changes of the fetus.

Crazy. I wonder if that's something we could influence.

I've heard that a baby that's been gestating for a much longer time than 9 months literally wouldn't fit through the birth canal due to the physical limitation of the width of the mother's hips. The baby would have to be either artificially gestated (which is some real sci-fi shit, like you're saying) or the mother would require a C-section, which is generally pretty high-risk and has a 6-month recovery period.

[-] Lodespawn@aussie.zone 7 points 1 day ago

Huh? Csections arent high risk if they are planned, they become high risk when they are an emergency solution to a problem natural birth. Also the recovery period is 4-8 weeks

Full recovery from an incision that cuts through the abdominal muscles will always take longer than the initial recovery period. Keep in mind that most of us can't just take 6 months off of work, so a lot of recommendations from doctors and surgeons are cognizant of that reality.

[-] Sterile_Technique@lemmy.world 4 points 1 day ago

Yeah it's super tight squeeze even in normal conditions from a skeletal perspective. Pushing much past 9mo would guarantee a c-section.

[-] scott@lemmy.org 10 points 2 days ago

What the fuck that's so creepy

[-] hydrashok@sh.itjust.works 7 points 2 days ago

They’ll do anything to not take care of the kids already here that need parents and support.

[-] eager_eagle@lemmy.world 7 points 2 days ago

That's weird, I watched Children of Men last night

[-] pruwybn@discuss.tchncs.de 5 points 1 day ago

I watched that movie not knowing anything about it. When they start taking about the "youngest person on Earth" In the first scene, I thought it was a comedy 🤣

[-] sundray@lemmus.org 6 points 2 days ago

From the makers of Oldboy (2013) comes... Oldbaby.

this post was submitted on 31 Jul 2025
185 points (100.0% liked)

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