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[-] mhague@lemmy.world 3 points 6 days ago

Flower petal distribution.

Like a voronoi grid with limited colors, each color a state. Every state would have a bit of everything.

[-] thatradomguy@lemmy.world 3 points 6 days ago

If Dr Suess was in charge of naming the states:

[-] gedaliyah@lemmy.world 62 points 1 week ago

Residents of Floxas notice no change.

[-] WeirdGoesPro@lemmy.dbzer0.com 8 points 1 week ago

I was about to say—we lost the panhandle, and nobody realistically knows what lives there anyway.

[-] arrow74@lemmy.zip 5 points 1 week ago

I think it becomes the most populous state

[-] Hjalamanger@feddit.nu 37 points 1 week ago

You should sort them in alphabetical order, my European brain won't be able to remember them otherwise

[-] makyo@lemmy.world 5 points 1 week ago

And put them all to a catchy jingle

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[-] Lembot_0004@discuss.online 34 points 1 week ago

One line would be enough: to divide North from South.

[-] gedaliyah@lemmy.world 52 points 1 week ago

I think we tried that once.

[-] Lembot_0004@discuss.online 10 points 1 week ago

At that time only the South wanted independence, now it might be that both parts would rather live on their own.

[-] CorruptCheesecake@lemmy.world 14 points 1 week ago

These welfare queen red states would turn into Somalia in short order. If I can't make it back to a blue state before the borders close I'm going to fucking kill myself.

[-] Lembot_0004@discuss.online 8 points 1 week ago

Better to have a small Somalia2 than turn all the US into the Beautiful Somalia of Covfefe, don't you agree?

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[-] expatriado@lemmy.world 9 points 1 week ago

bible belt and sane people

[-] CorruptCheesecake@lemmy.world 8 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago)

Insular, gossipy, ugly, unintelligible, poorly dressed crazy religious dumbfucks and normal humans who actually have empathy and can accept their town gaining new residents without throwing a redneck tantrum about it every day while said new resident occupies free real estate in their moldy swamp brains.

[-] parody@lemmings.world 5 points 1 week ago

Right thooooo

ugly, poorly dressed

meh ain’t hurting nobody

unintelligible

little our fault innit, also don’t wanna punch down

Get your emotion though not denying your feeling :)

[-] CorruptCheesecake@lemmy.world 9 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago)

From my perspective it's punching back. But there are always exceptions to the rule. My philosophy is "give respect, get respect", not "viciously slander, patronize and exclude outsiders until they break yet somehow still feel entitled to their kindness and expect them to suck you off and inflate your already over-inflated ego".

[-] evening_push579@feddit.nu 23 points 1 week ago

Split it along the time zones instead. Less states and simpler administration. Washington DC can be its own time zone just to mess with people.

[-] Hubbubbub@fedia.io 16 points 1 week ago

Fuck that. The Northeast created this country and we're not gonna be erased.

[-] mojofrododojo@lemmy.world 33 points 1 week ago

you also created new jersey, take some fuckin responsibility for your sins

[-] VoteNixon2016 7 points 1 week ago

Fine, New Jersey is taking its Unix and going home then

[-] mojofrododojo@lemmy.world 6 points 1 week ago

oh shit.

well, bsd, er, linux-shit... uh.... TempleOS it is!

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[-] FelixCress@lemmy.world 16 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago)

I especially like IDiOTA

Also

America's borders

USA borders.

[-] OhStopYellingAtMe@lemmy.world 9 points 1 week ago

“America” is a shortened name for “United States of America,” in addition to the name of the continent. It can be both, you know.

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[-] makyo@lemmy.world 8 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago)

Believe it or not, those two terms are used interchangably and somehow no one gets confused. A continent AND a country can both have the same name without the world ending.

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[-] fraksken@infosec.pub 15 points 1 week ago

Floxas made me lol

[-] pruwybn@discuss.tchncs.de 10 points 1 week ago

I like how the map shows the curvature of the north border (49th parallel), meaning all these lines bulge north in the middle.

[-] rustydrd@sh.itjust.works 9 points 1 week ago

Utucky

No u.

[-] Sir_Premiumhengst@lemmy.world 7 points 1 week ago

Alascanada?

Hawacuba?

[-] the_crotch@sh.itjust.works 7 points 1 week ago
[-] DeathByBigSad@sh.itjust.works 7 points 1 week ago
[-] pineapplelover@lemmy.zip 5 points 6 days ago

"Where you from?"

"Middle"

[-] ianhclark510 6 points 6 days ago

as an Oregonian I 100% accpt the decision to merge us with Warshington

[-] WhyIHateTheInternet@lemmy.world 6 points 1 week ago

Bullshit. I just moved from Oklahoma to California to escape the hell hole that is that backwards ass state and I'm not reincorporating.

[-] CorruptCheesecake@lemmy.world 5 points 1 week ago

You have ascended to heaven. If you ever feel stressed, just remember that the people you left behind are still playing in the mud and catching exotic third world diseases.

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[-] jaupsinluggies@feddit.uk 6 points 1 week ago

Americans are so dumb when it comes to timezones we could just assign Maintana to GMT+5, Washconsin GMT+6 and so on downwards. It wouldn't make any difference to them and it'd be a lot more fun for the rest of us.

True story: "The meeting is at 1500 EDT". "Your state is currently on EST so if I turn up at the specified time I'll be an hour late. Are you sure it's 1500 EDT and not 1500 EST?" "Yes, definitely 1500 EDT". /me turns up at 1500 EDT to find the meeting has already finished.

I misread IDOTA as IDIOTA.

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[-] ashenone@lemmy.ml 6 points 1 week ago

Maintana most beautiful state

[-] Jackcooper@lemmy.world 5 points 1 week ago

Floxas gonna absolutely kill at college football

[-] Cort@lemmy.world 4 points 1 week ago

But the target of basically all the hurricanes

[-] moakley@lemmy.world 5 points 1 week ago

As a resident of Floxus, I propose we make the creeping phlox our state flower.

(It smells like rotting skunk.)

[-] umbrella@lemmy.ml 4 points 1 week ago

this unironically looks like how some colonies used ro be divvied up. fitting for a colonial empire.

[-] disguy_ovahea@lemmy.world 4 points 1 week ago* (last edited 1 week ago)

I feel for Louisiana getting lumped into Floxas, run by the mutant abomination AbbSantis.

[-] ininewcrow@lemmy.ca 4 points 1 week ago

Sounds more like a new line up of pharmaceuticals for the treatment of those suffering from delusions of grandeur and acute narcissism

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this post was submitted on 30 Jun 2025
726 points (100.0% liked)

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