So in this version, since they ain't kin, they decide to just be friends?

"God damn this cholesterol, deep within your arteries"

Oh give me a hoooommmme where the werewolves all roam and the vaaaampires are sparkly all dayyyyyy

I got the blood of a cowboy Bella yeeeee-hawww

Is this the white stripes?

"yer walks faster than ah can run, yer paler than a ghost, and y'all? got a driver's license? i ain't buyin it. Ah reckon ah know what yer affliction is"
"say it wit ya whole chest!"
"got dang yankee"
"and whaddaya suppose we feed on, ay?"
"Why ah gather it ain't shrimp n grits" cut to shot of edward wearing a greasy white tank top and sucking down a bowl of spaghetti