I can hardly speak to people anymore. Suppressing my gender for 4 years then finally coming out feels awful. I really thought it would be better. I know my family would have issues but fuck. I have so many thoughts in my head but I can't get more than a word to two before bursting to tears.
Add on top of that the most stressful school schedule I've faced yet and the political climate?

I kinda just want to go to sleep and never wake up to go through more of the same pain the next day.

Tired already. Four more years of this shit

I currently work as a postdoc in biomedical research, so my line of work was directly in the line of fire of recent Trump administration nonsense... Not great.

Beyond this though, I'm just impressed at how almost delusional my boss and some of my lab members has been. Lab PI/group leaders are responsible for bringing in grants, yet they don't seem to even care about the fact that almost all grant reviews are paused (and some of their grants are due early Feb!)... Not to mention they seem almost happy about RFK and Bhattacharya; I do not approve of such behavior as a researcher... Especially since another student in the lab is fucking suffering from long COVID-induced chronic fatigue. I don't understand how could some other ppl in the lab be so insensitive

To be fair, I've been essentially "fired" from the lab anyway. Not actually fired, but was on an 1-year contract and PI refused to renew (and it's more difficult to fire someone than not renewing contract in Illinois law anyway). Pretty shitty behavior but I guess I should have expected a newer PI to not know how to properly lead a lab... Partly due to that, I've started applying for jobs in Europe two months ago and have just recently started getting interviews. All of them are scheduled early morning for me, I'm not a morning person, and at least one or two have been somewhat disrespectful so... At least I'm hoping to get at least one offer I hope?

Also am worried about selling some large possessions (furniture, hobbyist items) since I'm probably leaving the US soon. So a bit stressed recently between work and personal matters

All in all, I'm... surprisingly calm for the amount of bullshit I need to deal with. No ideal why. Maybe it's just the power of video games lol

okayish. didn't get enough sleep, because i poured me a big soft drink yesterday evening and decided to watch shows until i drank it all up, even though i slowly exceeded waaaayy past bedtime. i regret nothing!

Just finished my calculus exam and am reveling in the freedom. Well not too much because I have linear algebra next week, but it's the small things.

Haven't been sleeping super well and my back is burning because of it. Stressed to high heaven about rent but luckily not awake enough for a panic attack yet

I feel fine. Sure, there’s lots of stuff to do, but it’s ok. Just one thing at a time…

Up and down. Actually lots of things are falling into place, and a few "end points reached" are proving to be... just new starting points.

What to say, need to get my knee in order tough. After last marathon it is still giving me issues and i am fed up to wait and want to go back running....

I'm tired and with a few deadlines that will hit me on monday. I need to finish my task or i wont get vacations... so... all the fuel is going to the wrong place.

I'm tired has a busy few days I was horrifically ill at the end of last year which I'm recovering from

I'm doing great! Thank you for asking. I recently woke up from a nap, and now I'm hungry! Though I'm not entirely sure what it is I want to eat... How are you? 😃

Pretty awful. We received our cat's ashes today =/

Wondering how long it will take for the world to start world war 3 and which fascist regime were going to be fighting.

I am very hungry and dehydrated but I cannot leave my bed

I’m good. Trying to figure out which remote part of the world I’d like to visit, maybe stay there.