Panel #7: Regret
"Why did I take so long to get here?"
You're here now, and that's pretty awesome!
Confused enby here, what does re:zero have to do with this?
I was going to ask the same. Like I know Fenix is a character, but not a big enough character
Also, once you realize you're an enby you kinda live in several of these stages at once.
Denial ("I feel comfortable being addressed and seen as a guy, so I can't be enby")
Anger ("Why do people always ignore the 'it' in 'it/he'?")
Bargaining ("I just care a lot about respecting pronouns, so that's why I get upset. I'm just doing this to add to enby visibility, because I don't really mind.")
Depression ("I suppose people just don't like referring to humans with pronouns normay used for objects, that's just how it is")
Acceptance ("Okay I definitely feel good about being called 'it', so I'm probably agender")
Bargaining again ("Maybe I'm some in-between? Not really cis, but not really enby either?")
Proceeds to cycle between Denial, Bargaining, Acceptance and Bargaining again, with Anger and Depression playing a constant tug-of-war as backdrop
Insert meme of mother yelling at her kid "Why can't you just be normal", but it's me yelling at my Identity "Why can't you just be simple"
I mostly exist beyond this menial earthly scale but do on occasion return to anger and depression quite frequently. Mostly due to being purposefully misgendered. I'm not a girl, and not transfem, I don't have a gender
Denial was never a thing I went through, ever, I am indeed happy and comfortable with being called a boy, even though I'm not really. I still say I'm a femboy because that describes my experience of dressing up and being cute. Doesn't mean I am a boy.
No idea. I didn't make the meme, but my guess is it's a reference to a sliver of time in r/egg_irl's history where every other post was Re:Zero themed.
Oh yeah the whole thing with Felix. I remember that π¬.
I'm not surprised that would make someone angry, as someone agender who does identify with the femboy experience it did make me a bit angry, especially when people said it made me a girl (egg prime directive wasn't practiced much back then). Though thankfully things have gotten better these days (here I mean, not on Reddit, I haven't touched Reddit).
#5 Depression
Haven't started E yet Worried that it will become hard to get like ADHD Meds, also worried about my ADHD getting worse after E ππ»ββοΈ
My ADHD got better after e, but I also needed to lower the dosage. If the dosage was too high, taking meds had an opposite effect.
There's a fascinating reason! Estrogen has a profound impact on your brain!
In addition to being one of the main hormones that is responsible for regulating the female reproductive system, estrogen also plays a role in cognitive function. It modulates the neurotransmitters serotonin, dopamine, and norepinephrine. These neurotransmitters help with focus, concentration, mood, and memory.
That's why when a ciswoman with ADHD has a massive dip in estrogen (my body will essentially suddenly stop production of estrogen to trigger a period) their symptoms drastically worsen.
And why a person taking e might find their ADHD symptoms lessen!
Estrogen does so many things to almost every part of your body! It even improves liver functioning in a wide variety of animals, from livestock like chickens to humans of all sexes and genders. It makes you significantly healthier until menopause, where evolution effectively removes the advantages it provides. The same is probably true for testosterone lowering in males with age, as nature wants to take us out of the gene pool once we've served our purpose.
nyaaa <3
You want headpats? Come here! π€
Stage 5: I both know that I'm a girl and am consistently too depressed to do anything about it. Hrt is hard to get where I am and tbh I don't have the energy to fight back against the world as they crush my spirit every day.
Affirming my gender is necessary for me to have the energy to get out of bed. I was literally nonfunctional before I came out. Starting and staying on e has been the driving force in my life for the past year. Why fight for myself if I hate who I am?
At the moment I'm not allowed to be even slightly feminine, as for why I fight tbh I feel like I've given up.
The only advice I can give is to look for support in your country. They'll know what can and can't be done. If you ever get the point of not being able to carry on, transition should be your only priority. At that point, you'd have nothing to lose.
Stage #6
gives headpats ;3
:3
Congratulations ππ
Cutie ! Headpats!
:3
Stage #7 trying to find someone who will date me lol
Doing pretty well otherwise! :)
Stage 5. I have persistent and horrible dysphoria from my voice which I know will never pass as a girl without voice surgery. Which I'll probably be unable to get for quite a while.
Maybe I should learn sign language and say I'm mute. I'd rather be mute than have a horrible masculine ass voice.
I personally feel the same, but I'm still interested in voice training on the grounds of using it to fuck with people π
Testosterone fucked me harder than the government as far as my voice goes.
I did voice training for years and even though I did get good I was never able to pass. People who are trans supportive say my voice sounds feminine to be nice to me but I know it doesn't pass because I got second opinions anonymously from people who didn't know I was trans or at least whether I was masc or fem. They all said my voice sounded masculine, even though I was trying as best I could do to sound feminine.
I'm number four, except that for me it's actually just a fetisch, right? π€·
Would you want to be a girl in nonsexual situations? When driving to work or sitting alone, would it still be fun to be feminine? You can definitely live as a man and have sex as woman, but would you be disappointed if that's all it is?
I'm comfortable living as a man, and before I imagined myself as a woman in sexual situations I had never thought about it. I think I'm a bit ignorant as to what affect gender has on nonsexual situations. Like how does having boobs or not change anything when you're just sitting alone?
I just don't think I care that much about my body either way.
For me, I just feel more comfortable existing in the world as a woman. There's no logic behind it; it just is. I feel depressed when I feel like a man in any situation, but I didn't know that for most of my life. I just thought being miserable was normal. I didn't even think I would want to be a girl until I was an adult. I had to experiment to figure that out.
I liked myself as a woman in sexual situations, but it turned out that I wanted to be a woman in all situations. As terrifying as upending my sense of self was, I'm finally happy.
Like I said, there is literally nothing wrong with having a fem kink. Kinks have been incorrectly demonized by science due to cultural biases against sexuality. Unless it hurts you or someone else, there's nothing pathological about it. It also doesn't mean you have to commit to a gender that isn't right for you. Do what makes you happy! β€
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