46
submitted 11 months ago by Facebones@reddthat.com to c/fuck_cars@lemmy.ml

Everyone I know, even more "progressive" people, treat me like a damn alien for not prioritizing getting a new car since mine died over covid.

Why does nobody blink an eye at this habit people have of just..... Sitting in their car in the driveway? Its not on, there's no music, they aren't leaving - they're just sitting there for an hour or more. I see it fairly often, but if I mention it being odd people look at me like I'm dumb. Are we really THAT car centric now that it's this normalized to be like "fuck my living room, fuck my TV, fuck my couch, I just wanna sit in my car all day?"

all 41 comments
sorted by: hot top controversial new old
[-] ch00f@lemmy.world 22 points 11 months ago

I mean if you think of a car as a personal privacy pod, many people don’t have those inside their homes. I remember seeing this a lot on our walks during covid. I think some people needed a private place for a phone call or just needed to get away from their family for an hour or so when there was literally nowhere else to go.

Hate cars all you want, but this is hardly indicative of car culture.

[-] delirious_owl@discuss.online 3 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago)

Lol wut. Cars are surveillance pods.

They're internet-connected and full of microphone, cameras, and other sensor. Its less private than a public bus.

[-] tryitout@infosec.pub 18 points 11 months ago

I see this a lot too. Based on where I live, I've assumed it's bc there are too many people living in the house and they need some peace and quiet and/or talk on the phone in private. It's common to see 6+ cars in front of 3 bedroom houses here, housing prices being what they are.

[-] superkret@feddit.org 17 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago)

I can understand it.
There are hardly any places left outside your home where you can simply exist without spending money.

[-] peanuts4life 13 points 11 months ago

To be fair, my old Corolla is comfortable, with adjustable seats, climate control, and a sound system. It's a little mobile room that society requires I own, I might as well enjoy it. I'll spend 10 to 15 minutes sometimes after work just watching videos on my phone before / after going home.

My partner and and I will sometimes sit talking in their Prius for a long time after reaching a destination.

[-] sodalite@slrpnk.net 12 points 11 months ago

from people I've talked to who do that (and me) it's usually to get away from other people before going inside somewhere. like the husband who chills in his car to avoid the wife, or the son who doesn't wanna go in to deal with the dad yet.

the car is a portable bubble, an escape, your own little contained environment in which you can exercise some form of control. a mini home away from home for some.

[-] Facebones@reddthat.com 5 points 11 months ago

If you have to sit in your car for 3 hours to avoid your wife, you need a divorce. 🤣

Same with any other situation, if you have to live in your car you need to change your living situation.

[-] Annoyed_Crabby@monyet.cc 14 points 11 months ago

Not many people sit for 3 hours, but many sit for maybe half hour. you're exaggerating stuff.

And no, not many people can "change their living situation" with a snap of their finger either, because they're mostly trapped in that situation unwillingly, whether physically or mentally. That's why they chose escapism in some shape or form, and doomscrolling in their quiet car after a long day is one of em.

Yes, it's unhealthy but laughing at them as if you're superior helps no one and only makes people resent this community more. This community shouldn't be that literal.

[-] Facebones@reddthat.com 3 points 11 months ago

I'm going to ignore you now for your bad faith arguments. You don't know my experiences, or the behavior of people in my area.

I think its weird and unhealthy, coping mechanism or not, and I refuse to pretend it isn't to make people comfortable. Check out exercise or therapy.

[-] Annoyed_Crabby@monyet.cc 4 points 11 months ago

It's call "disagreement", sis. There's no bad faith in it.

[-] dustyData@lemmy.world 2 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago)

You're the one being bad faith all over this post. But anyways, what I really wanted to comment is that it might be a unhealthy coping mechanism, but oftentimes it is the only one people have. Specially in the context of the US, people can't afford mental health care and a lot of people are overworked to the point they don't have any energy left to exercise. Just let them have their private alone time, you're a weirdo commenting on other's habits while displaying absolutely zero empathy to other's struggles.

[-] Facebones@reddthat.com 1 points 11 months ago

I'm commenting on weird car habits in a "fuck cars" community, lines up pretty well if you ask me. Are you sure you're in the right community? I'm sure there's plenty of pro-car communities on Lemmy for you where you can enjoy discussing centering your life around your automobile over your home.

You claim I have zero empathy but you're the one arguing "fuck healthy or productive coping mechanisms living your life in your car is just as good and fuck you for saying that people should seek better options." GTFO with that nonsense.

[-] dustyData@lemmy.world 1 points 11 months ago

Nice strawmans. You are really good at constructing them. I'm against cars, but I fight against the culprits, oil and manufacturing companies and corrupt politicians who run car centric policies under billionaires lobbying. I don't attack people who are forced into a lifestyle that leaves them no healthy avenues for mental health or that deprives them of healthier life choices. Yours is the logic that criminalize the homeless for sleeping in their cars in a public parking lot. You get out with your twisted logic. This is not about being cruel to the people forced to depend on cars, it is against the system that forces us all into that unhealthy lifestyle.

[-] sodalite@slrpnk.net 10 points 11 months ago

yeah, they do. unfortunately a lot of people are stuck in situations not easily got out of... that's why they escape to their car...

[-] maegul@lemmy.ml 6 points 11 months ago

Are we really THAT car centric now that it’s this normalized to be like “fuck my living room, fuck my TV, fuck my couch, I just wanna sit in my car all day?”

Yes ... that's the problem.

To be fair though, I imagine there's a lot of people just enjoying their own mobile private space away from others. But yea, this is the problem, we've dedicated so much of our city's space to cars and roads, that the car can be kinda all we have left. And then it's infectious. Sure it might be nice to hang out in your mobile space near a park or the beach ... but then there's a car park for all of the cars ... taking up space which could just be more park land or beach front.

[-] Showroom7561@lemmy.ca 5 points 11 months ago

My wife does this, and it drives me crazy. She'll come back from running an errand, then when she pulls in the driveway, her notifications will go off (because she's now connected to wifi). She will sit in the car... on her phone... for at least a half hour until I finally remind her that the dog is barking her head off while she sits in the driveway...

I'm the opposite. If I do have to drive, I want out of that damn thing ASAP. I find no pleasure sitting in a metal cage for no apparent reason.

[-] sonori@beehaw.org 1 points 11 months ago

Ya, I can definitely see getting distracted catching up with things if you have a lot of social or work interactions through text or email and have you’re phone mute notifications and calls while driving.

[-] zephorah@lemm.ee 5 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago)

I can’t say that I see this a lot but I can tell you why I and others I’ve spoken to do it. I’ll leave you to ponder and extrapolate reasons.

.

It’s quiet.

.

No other humans are talking to or at you.

.

Quiet = bliss.

[-] Facebones@reddthat.com 4 points 11 months ago

If you have to spend 3 hours a day in your car to avoid people, you need to speak to a professional.

[-] inb4_FoundTheVegan@lemmy.world 5 points 11 months ago

Therapy is expensive, time consuming and tragically filled with social stigmas. People are coping with the thing they already own in the only way they know how.

[-] Facebones@reddthat.com 4 points 11 months ago

That doesn't make it healthy. As someone who is hyper isolated due to living on a pension, it only compounds itself.

[-] zephorah@lemm.ee 3 points 11 months ago

3 hrs is a lot. I think my top time was 30min. Still. It’s cheaper than therapy.

[-] Hikermick@lemmy.world 4 points 11 months ago

I'll drive slower on my way home if there's a good song playing. Just sitting there seems weird. What's up with all the people recording themselves on video while sitting in their car?

[-] MrJameGumb@lemmy.world 3 points 11 months ago

I have never experienced this lol I've sat in my car for like 20 minutes when I had to eat lunch in the car before but that's about it.

I've never seen anyone just sit motionless in their car for an hour before though... Maybe that's a regional thing?

[-] Facebones@reddthat.com 4 points 11 months ago

Thats possible I reckon. I live in a fairly conservative Bible belt "city" so I'm used to being surrounded by all the things I find insane, counter productive, etc 🤣

[-] rem26_art@fedia.io 3 points 11 months ago

I see that a lot when I walk to the local park. People will be sitting in their cars just chillin, windows closed, and parked right next to a set of park benches on a nice, clear day.

[-] Facebones@reddthat.com 3 points 11 months ago

Thats super popular at the Greenway parking lot near me, but honestly where its at I always assume "drug deals."

It doesn't bother me but it makes me laugh when I walk by lol.

[-] queermunist@lemmy.ml 2 points 11 months ago

I guess it's like sitting on your porch?

Seems bleek. 😞

[-] MrJameGumb@lemmy.world 2 points 11 months ago
[-] queermunist@lemmy.ml 3 points 11 months ago

Spell check didn't care so I don't either lol

[-] MrJameGumb@lemmy.world 3 points 11 months ago

Apparently "bleek" is a real word!

Bleek: adjective. pale [adjective] (of a person, his face etc) having less colour/color than normal. wan [adjective] pale and sickly-looking.

[-] tunetardis@lemmy.ca 1 points 11 months ago

I've caught my wife doing this on numerous occasions. The typical scenario is we'll meet after work someplace for dinner. I'm on my bike and she's driving. So we head home separately and she arrives first. But as I'm putting the bike away, I see a light turning on behind me and it's her climbing out of the car.

I've seen this also at fast food parking lots and it puzzles me even more. There's a guy just sitting there not eating or doing anything. Did he eat already? Was he not hungry and but his partner was so he's just waiting for them?

Last time I saw one of these guys as I was entering the restaurant. I ate my lunch and sat around for maybe 20 min because I prefer not to cycle again immediately after eating. Then I come out and the dude is still there, staring off into space.

[-] drolex@sopuli.xyz 4 points 11 months ago

Maybe - I know this might sound a bit extreme - ask your wife about it?

[-] tunetardis@lemmy.ca 4 points 11 months ago

Heh yeah. I've asked her on a few occasions and she looks embarrassed and gives me a different answer every time. I figure she just needs a moment and so I've stopped prying.

[-] drolex@sopuli.xyz 5 points 11 months ago

~~Huh hoh, she's having an affair with the car. You should have seen the red flag~~

Sorry I thought this was reddit

this post was submitted on 21 Aug 2024
46 points (100.0% liked)

Fuck Cars

11255 readers
11 users here now

This community exists as a sister community/copycat community to the r/fuckcars subreddit.

This community exists for the following reasons:

You can find the Matrix chat room for this community here.

Rules

  1. Be nice to each other. Being aggressive or inflammatory towards other users will get you banned. Name calling or obvious trolling falls under that. Hate cars, hate the system, but not people. While some drivers definitely deserve some hate, most of them didn't choose car-centric life out of free will.

  2. No bigotry or hate. Racism, transphobia, misogyny, ableism, homophobia, chauvinism, fat-shaming, body-shaming, stigmatization of people experiencing homeless or substance users, etc. are not tolerated. Don't use slurs. You can laugh at someone's fragile masculinity without associating it with their body. The correlation between car-culture and body weight is not an excuse for fat-shaming.

  3. Stay on-topic. Submissions should be on-topic to the externalities of car culture in urban development and communities globally. Posting about alternatives to cars and car culture is fine. Don't post literal car fucking.

  4. No traffic violence. Do not post depictions of traffic violence. NSFW or NSFL posts are not allowed. Gawking at crashes is not allowed. Be respectful to people who are a victim of traffic violence or otherwise traumatized by it. News articles about crashes and statistics about traffic violence are allowed. Glorifying traffic violence will get you banned.

  5. No reposts. Before sharing, check if your post isn't a repost. Reposts that add something new are fine. Reposts that are sharing content from somewhere else are fine too.

  6. No misinformation. Masks and vaccines save lives during a pandemic, climate change is real and anthropogenic - and denial of these and other established facts will get you banned. False or highly speculative titles will get your post deleted.

  7. No harassment. Posts that (may) cause harassment, dogpiling or brigading, intentionally or not, will be removed. Please do not post screenshots containing uncensored usernames. Actual harassment, dogpiling or brigading is a bannable offence.

Please report posts and comments that violate our rules.

founded 4 years ago
MODERATORS