If they have a practical concern with this they can say something like (use name) (unsure) (any) after their username. Just to verify, are you trans yourself? This is common practice in basically every trans space.

Yes, and that is WHY I’m so vocal about it, because I have experience with environments where the choice really was to misgender myself or to risk looking like a biggot. It sucked and that

Requiring people to state their pronouns is unironically a transphobic policy!

No, it’s not.

It forces trans people who are early in their transition and eggs to pick between two really bad options. That makes it functionally (not intentionally) transphobic.

closeted trans people who have an identifiable account and similar groups now have to misgender themselves, which is a much more horrific thing than getting misgendered by someone else.

I would suggest they create a new account for exploring these feelings in trans spaces, then. Its more secure to do that anyways.

A big point of something like Lemmy is that you don’t need separate accounts in all the communities that you are in and trans communities should put the bar low for people who are looking to explore things. It may not always be the safest thing to do, but reality is messy and people who are just kinda uncomfortable with what they have may still be far away from understanding.

He/him is the assumed choice in most internet spaces which misgenders a wide swathe of trans people, of course I would prefer it to be they/them, as its better if you don’t know the person’s pronouns. The reality though is we need to implement these things in steps so people can properly understand why its important to use they/them when you don’t know someone’s gender. I still get regularly misgendered with she/her in my name, these people that purposefully misgender must be removed from this space to make it safer, and by having more people with pronouns in username, it will make that job easier.

Nobody says you can’t have your pronouns in your username if you want them too, but forcing other people to do the same is really reaching into other people’s personal zone to an extend that I do consider inappropriate.

what is the difference between putting (unsure) or (any) and just not having them? you would still basically have to ask or assume you picked the right one.

on a side note, making "requirements" to be trans is a slippery slope, and nobody should have to prove, or our themselves, just by existing and participating in the world.

and why should it matter if I know I'm interacting with a trans person? why can't we all just treat each other with respect, and if we want to find out more about each other individually we can just ask?

and while your solution of "just make another account" could work for some it simply won't work for all

why do people in general need to know this at a glance? Can they not tell by the content of my posts that I support trans people? I thought this rule was to help mods make quick judgments.

Okay, thank you for explaining!

Light hearted

huh, okay, today i learned. now that you've mentioned it i do see your display name if i click through to your user page, but not on your posts/comments, and idk how to change mine, but if other folks can see that, i'll look into it if i see a way.

it doesn't want to save my changes 🤔

Sorry, I didn't want to make a bad faith argument, but I think it's necessary to clarify the issue.

The exemption will allow bigots from those instances to still have access and the benefit of doubt. People who might have valid reasons to not disclose openly their position will have to create a new account.

If pronouns are a safety measure, there's a big flaw in making exemptions. Will the users know the people they are talking are not marked because they can't be.

Just a thought. Maybe make it a required opener or signature.

(he / him / queer)

🤦 thanks