I've reframed it as a spectrum rather than a binary so I don't have to think about it.
I can't 👍👍👍👍 (this is a call for help)
If you figure it out, let me know. I'm a golden retriever girlfriend who falls in love way too quick with anyone and everyone.
Joking aside, it's the feeling of camaraderie vs desire for intimacy for me, i think.
Me too (except for the girlfriend part, though I'm not entirely sure on that front)
But don't forget the terrifying fear of intimacy and letting romance ruin a good friendship
IDK myself... I'm pretty sure I'm just aromantic or perhaps just another symptom of having BPD (I either hate you or love you; there's no in-between).
I would have sex with anyone. I can be friends with almost anyone. And I can sure as hell have both someone who has sex with me that's a friend. What more is there? Dumb gestures instead of just communicating your feelings verbally?
I've searched for an explanation of "romantic attraction" that I can actually understand and still don't know what the hell it really means. So either I don't experience it, or it's just not easy to explain. Or I am the dumb. 🤷🏻♂️
I think the romantic element is linked to desire for intimacy of some kind or other, and is there to some degree in every friendship, but when that becomes a “romantic attraction” usually varies and honestly is defined in hindsight more often than not.
So, not knowing is normal. If someone is pressing you to decide, they can definitely wait.