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this post was submitted on 14 Apr 2024
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We were talking to my daughter about this just yesterday. It's not even groceries. People think that if you spend $30 or $40 a month on things that make you and those you love happy, you'll never save enough to make yourself marginally more comfortable in the last 10-20 years of your life (if you're lucky) that will be uncomfortable no matter what.
So I suppose maybe if I denied myself and my child every pleasure in life, sure, I could put money in a 401(k). That is not something I would do and I certainly do not think it's a good lesson to teach a child. I'm sure someone will call that some sort of "live for today" or YOLO attitude rather than not giving your child the most miserable childhood you can.
But that's unproductive hyperbole. Not every pleasure in life costs money, and lots of things you spend money on can be optimized. And even after doing that, if you still feel too squeezed, it might be worth considering a career change and a plan for how to get there.
It might be unproductive hyperbole, but I've been told that exact same thing more than once right here on Lemmy.
Sounds like you have an axe to grind. Sorry life has been hard for you friend. Hope it gets better. Hang in there.
You were telling your daughter that you're spending $30/mo on her to make her happy instead of saving it for your old age? I don't know how you communicated that, but on the surface that does not sound like a healthy thing to tell a child.
If you're worried about providing your daughter a fulfilling childhood, maybe also consider prioritizing time with her? You spend a lot of time on Lemmy dude, is that time you could be spending with her? Or are you on your phone a lot when you're with her?
Do you think that maybe you don't pay attention to what actual times of day I'm on Lemmy vs. when I'm not on Lemmy and think that maybe I spend those times with my family?
I'm here a lot because I'm currently very sick (I recently got back from the Mayo Clinic). I suppose that's my fault?
No, I've never paid attention to when you're online, I just see you average 100 comments and posts per day. I still think telling your daughter that you're spending $30/month on her instead of saving for retirement is not healthy.
I know a lot of people taking care of their elderly parents. I have yet to meet one who says they regretted their parents buying them toys. Do you know any?
Also, as I already said, I am on Lemmy a lot because I am very sick and have nothing else to do most of the time.
You're misunderstanding my point. I'm saying it's not healthy to tell your young child explicitly that you're making this choice between buying them a toy or saving for retirement. This conversation started with you saying you just had that conversation with your daughter yesterday.
Do you think the conversation was literally "I'm making a choice between buying you this toy and saving for retirement?" For one thing, she's almost 14.
Egad man, what is happening in your head
Here is what is happening in my head.
You said:
I agree. But I don't have a young child anyway.
That was not the conversation we had.
I hope this clears things up.
You should probably go up top there and change where you said "I just had this conversation with my daughter yesterday"....
I did not say that. That is false. This is what I said and this is it in context:
In other words, I was talking to my daughter about people who think you should invest money rather than buy groceries.
Once again, I hope this clears things up.
Not even a little 😕 Who exactly is telling you to invest your money instead of buying groceries?
https://www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/2017/may/15/australian-millionaire-millennials-avocado-toast-house
The only person I've seen attempting to make that argument in this thread is you. It's been a really weird strawman thing.