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What did you do to unlearn your pre-transition unhealthy coping mechanisms? (self.mtf)
submitted 10 months ago by Amelia_ to c/mtf
8 comments fedilink hide all child comments

Hiya ladies,

Today I'm trying to understand how to let go of the mean, unhappy boy I never wanted to be, and embrace the passionate, loving girlie I dream of becoming.

Before I was brave enough to accept myself I was self-isolating, over eating, and indulging in various other coping mechanisms for short term, unsustainable dopamine hits. I was also mean, anti-social, and very standoffish because I thought that's who people expected me to be.

Now I want to be, need to be, someone completely different, letting out the parts of myself that I suppressed for so long I forgot they were even there. How did you do it? How did you unlearn those almost instinctive behaviours and defence mechanisms that keep people away and keep your real self buried and suffocating?

Thank you in advance <3

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[-] Ekybio@lemmy.world 3 points 10 months ago

Since therapy has been mentioned a few times already, I would go with something else for a change of pace.

Even the worst behaviour has at least some "positive" or desirable aspects that are important to a person.

So if you find why you tend towards certain behaviour, take some time and effort to isolate these aspects.

More importantly, you then need to find something to replace it with something that contains the aspects you value, but do not have the same harmfull side-effects.

Example: Smoking when you are bored or to keep your moth busy. Instead of "just quitting" (which might be difficult), a switch to chewing gum might be more effective, while stopping the damage smoking causes.

Hope this helps!

this post was submitted on 14 Jan 2024
64 points (100.0% liked)

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