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Women on the Tea App Are Red-Flagging Men for Liking Pokémon
(www.distractify.com)
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this post was submitted on 12 Aug 2026
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Offbeat
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I guess, if you're that into the waspish drama-queens that gossip more than breathe, sure. Got a thing for Karens, Jessicas, et al?
It would be really nice if this could exist without being petty. I dated a guy who lied to me about having been in jail for nearly two decades for beating his mother to death, and I would love to be able to warn others about him. I have a google alert set up for his name and got a ping a few years ago that he was arrested for violating a restraining order taken out by the woman he dated after me and felt awful that I wasn’t able to warn her.
It’s both predictable and annoying that people are using it to be petty, but the concept is still useful, even if some use it in a way I find shallow. I don’t think it’s wild to imagine that some women would see this report and take it as a green flag. I met up with my husband for the first time after we matched on a dating app to play magic the gathering with him, so I know that some women look for nerds when dating. I previously went on a date with a different guy to play magic (I like seeing how someone plays, wins, and loses, plus it’s a low pressure first date activity that helps ease conversation), and he showed me his Khorne tattoo. He said he just really identified with the character when I asked why he had chosen Khorne, and I absolutely took that as a red flag, not because it’s nerdy, but because I don’t want to date someone who identifies with Khorne.
I would 100% support a twin app for men about women, to be clear, and I don’t know what the solution would be for non cishetero dating, but I wouldn’t be against any of them.
I’m not sure how to do it in a way that can’t be abused, sadly. My instinct is that maybe domestic violence (DV) crimes should be public knowledge - i.e. offenders, offences and sentences (but not victim information) should be on a publicly searchable database - but I’m not sure what unintended consequences there might be to this. My gut tells me that women reporting DV might experience more backlash from violent partners because reporting the DV puts the offender on a ‘list’, and that maybe it could encourage some abusers to vexatiously make false accusations to try to get someone on the list, but I don’t know how likely either of those would be. There’s not a simple solution, but we need to keep searching for the difficult solution because the status quo leads to way too many women dying at the hands of current or former partners.
In my country, an influencer set up such a website. Posts are manually reviewed and will link to the conviction decision. You can post domestic violence and sexual abuse perpetrators who have been committed. The court decisions are actually public data anyway, just a bit annoying to search.
Now, to fix the court system so that certain people don't file a DV claim to fuck with someone, knowing full well it'll get thrown out at best, but without any blowback on the perpetrator. 🤢
The system is not made for serving any of us —it was designed to incarcerate our population in record numbers, and with impunity.
ACAB, the whole way up.
Don't take the actions of random bitches on a social media site any more seriously than their existence on any other site