I go with “I want it to moo when I stab it”, but I actually would eat it raw, and have on many occasions (not from restaurant, but directly from a butcher)

But it’s been almost a decade since I ate a slab of meat. It just doesn't agree with my digestive system, and constipation for days isn't worth it. Im not strictly vegetarian, but as long as eggs don't count, I’m vegetarian probably 75% of days with the rest being pre-made meals or things people prepare for me, and a burger a few times a month. I’m not paying the premium for a beyond or impossible when they always taste freezer burned around here because they aren’t popular, but if they have a veg patty or black bean, I usually get that.