I agree that we've lost some "education" in conflict handling. For example, I think people should get their asses kicked for doing things society doesn't agree with, like neo-Nazis. That can't really happen anymore because there's too much surveillance, and it's technically illegal. Things like the "no tolerance policy" have made this worse too, where defending yourself is the same as attacking someone.

On you're question of learning to deal with ignorant assholes, no, I think I'd rather have parents that support me, because there's already far too many ignorant assholes who will treat them poorly. There's no need for a parent to add to that. They'll learn that lesson soon enough, if they haven't already. If they could choose one or the other, then sure, your option is better. They don't though. They will be bullied and mistreated for it outside of the home. The least that could happen is for them to be able to come home and be welcomed for who they are without judgement.