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Dummies Guide to Women
(sh.itjust.works)
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this post was submitted on 19 Jan 2026
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It's a bit of an overgeneralization to act like men are sex-obsessed and view relationships as a transaction where they can purchase sex by being nice.
It's human to want love and care, but so many people view men as only wanting sex, so if a man complains about being lonely, isolated, or being unloved, it seems like everyone jumps to the conclusion that he's only talking about sex. Then they scorn him, reinforcing the pattern of loneliness and building the sense of frustration and being a victim of ostracization.
Likewise, if a man is kind to a woman he'll generally be regarded with suspicion, like "what are you trying to get out of this?" Some people just value kindness and try to be nice for the sake of being nice; but if it lands them with accusations and scorn then it'll only go on so long before they stop. And then people will scorn them either for being rude to women or snubbing them. It seems it's impossible to be a man in the vicinity of women without opening oneself to being labeled as a misogynist, no matter what you do.
The reality is that men are also conscious and complex human beings, and depicting them as these simple and one-dimensional sex pests isn't really moving the dialogue forward. All it does is give women a temporary feeling of moral superiority which they then chase like any other addiction.
The comic doesn't talk about 'all men' or even 'men' at all. There are all sorts of people acting like this and if you don't, you don't have to defend yourself or attack your imagined adversary.
Not sure why you are getting downvoted. What wonderingwanderer says is true as well, but honestly not relevant to this comic. Comics with this type of messaging often very explicitly call out men (even those that don't treat women as such), which leads to a hostile counter response. This one just says "you're a dummy if you treat women like this", which yeah. You probably are, if not worse. But unlike many other examples it could literally also apply to other women, (eg. lesbians), non-binary, or other folks who objectify women. They are exceedingly rare I would bet, but things like TERFs exist too sadly.
Within context, it was very clearly directed towards men. If it were implicitly directed at any other demographic, it would be called a dogwhistle. So how is it not a dogwhistle?
You're right, men who act like that are pigs. Or perhaps more charitably, sheltered and clueless how social interaction work with anyone, especially social interactions with women.
But there's a lot of ground between "male with poor social skills tries to be nice and struggles with constant rejection" and "male demands sex as payment for basic pleasantries," the former of which seems more like a caricature than anything based in reality, and anyone who actually behaves like that would be shunned into oblivion.
In any case, the implication that anyone lacking social skills is a chauvinist pig is worn-out and unwelcome.
So if someone makes a comic titled "Men: a guide for dummies" and the two slides are "Not this way: (picture of a vending machine where "sex" is the input and "money/free dinner/free drinks" is the output)" and "this way: (picture with a man that says "complex, conscious human being that you can't program to buy you things")," would that be any different?
Because in my view, both are exploiting harmful stereotypes by making an overgeneralization about the implied opposite gender. You're defending OP's example, but somehow I expect you wouldn't be too happy about the one described above...
And by the way, if I had simply replied "not all men" to OP's comic, then I would have been mocked and ridiculed by people claiming that's just a manosphere dog whistle. But now it's okay for you to say it doesn't apply to all men when you're backtracking and attempting to diminish the concern that this plays on a harmful stereotype that's not-so-subtly directed towards men as a general category?
"Don't worry, not all women are golddiggers. If you're not one then you don't need to defend yourself or attack your imagined adversary when you see a post titled 'Dilbert Creator's insta thot wife disappears with prenup pension.'"
Same shit, different direction.
I sincerely hope you are a woman overreacting in defense of the other gender. Because if you're a man, you need to learn to appreciate some self-depreciating humor without getting butthurt. I could chuckle at the comic, because as usual, there is a (big) grain of truth in it.
So you're saying my argument is only valid if I'm a woman? And if I'm a man, I just need to learn to be more self-deprecating? What kind of double-standard is that?
Good luck trying to tell women to "appreciate some self-deprecating humor without getting butthurt." I'm sure that will turn out well for you.
Or is it only men who need to be self-deprecating? Cause again, that would be a double standard.
And if you find it self-deprecating to laugh at "men think sex is transactional," then you're telling on yourself. This comic is about you, so don't act morally superior to men who don't identify with it.
okay never mind, this topic is clearly going way over your head.
πͺ
Maybe it is just me, but I don't think I've been viewed with suspicion because of simply being nice. If you're sincere and nice, then this typically doesn't happen. If you're known as kind of a dick and you switch to being nice, people will take notice. If you're being seen as love-bombing, you will be seen as suspect. While I agree men should not be typecast as only sex driven, I'm curious how this part of your argument came into it...
Ah, then you must also have the privilege of being either conventionally attractive, endowed with good social skills, well-integrated into an accepted social group, or some combination of the above.
But go ahead and say anyone who has none of the above is probably a dick if he faces ostracization cause he probably deserves it.
Meanwhile all the studies showing numbers (and reason behind them) of women who view relationship and sex as a transaction and trade sex for something, including a man being nice to them: Am I a joke to you?
https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC4875790/
https://www.researchgate.net/publication/6217550_The_Factors_Influencing_Transactional_sex_Among_Young_men_and_Women_in_12_Sub-Saharan_African_Countries
https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/abs/pii/S0277953609004651?via=ihub
(And more studies on "sugar daddy", e.g. https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/33433242/ )
Tldr: it's not even overgeneralization, it's diminishing the female agency in the trade. Which I think is worse.
But... but... some feminists on reddit told me golddiggers aren't real and only men are culpable in transactional relationships!!!1!
You know, any critique of a woman's behavior is a harmful generalization. But generalizations about men are totally fine and anyone who says "not all men are like that" is a redpilled incel, apparently...
...at least according to reddit feminists (not real feminists)