A dude I grew up with was FURIOUSLY homophobic. We watched the movie Big Daddy, everyone loved it but him. “Nah, I’m leaving. I can’t stand that queer shit. The movie would have been just fine without it.”
In his 20s he lost his damn mind. He wouldn’t watch television, terrified that he’d have to see something gay. He shut down completely, stopped hanging out with people.
Well, he met a girl in an online game, they got married. A gay dude moved into their neighborhood, wife came home and caught him blowing the dude.
Now he’s out of the closet.
He said it was exhausting always feeling like he was going to be outed. You could seriously make him leave a party by just mentioning something about gay people. He’d get super pissed, make a scene, then leave.
I remember him fighting a friend for making a joke (maybe he wasn’t joking) about them having a sexual encounter. I mean, it was brutal. Held him down at my front door choking him screaming, “you tell the goddamn truth! I ain’t never touched you removed!”
I laughed at him when he came in my store with his boyfriend. I said, “Dude, you fucking haaaaated gay people.”
He said it was exhausting always feeling like he was going to be outed.
This is definitely something that feels all too common with queer people. I know it's certainly how I felt before coming out as trans, to where I'd want to share memes with my friend group but constantly policed myself worrying that somehow it would "tip them off" somehow. I was in a weird place of being extremely invested in trans issues while also being pretty transphobic at times, basically so no one would think I was so interested because I was trans or anything.
It definitely all led to a lot of tension and anger and a very poor state of mental health overall, and just fucking sucked having to put on such a shitty persona all the time to try and hide my true self.
I'm somewhat sympathetic to folks like him, we all find our own way and some have a more direct path than others, but I do get frustrated how a lot of gay folks like that center themselves in their stories. They may have hated themselves most, but they hated the rest of us too, they may have been targeting themselves, but they hurt the rest of us too. They get big and loud when they're homophobic, but when they accept themselves many get small and quiet, when they've got some karma to work back.
A dude I grew up with was FURIOUSLY homophobic. We watched the movie Big Daddy, everyone loved it but him. “Nah, I’m leaving. I can’t stand that queer shit. The movie would have been just fine without it.”
In his 20s he lost his damn mind. He wouldn’t watch television, terrified that he’d have to see something gay. He shut down completely, stopped hanging out with people.
Well, he met a girl in an online game, they got married. A gay dude moved into their neighborhood, wife came home and caught him blowing the dude.
Now he’s out of the closet.
He said it was exhausting always feeling like he was going to be outed. You could seriously make him leave a party by just mentioning something about gay people. He’d get super pissed, make a scene, then leave.
I remember him fighting a friend for making a joke (maybe he wasn’t joking) about them having a sexual encounter. I mean, it was brutal. Held him down at my front door choking him screaming, “you tell the goddamn truth! I ain’t never touched you removed!”
I laughed at him when he came in my store with his boyfriend. I said, “Dude, you fucking haaaaated gay people.”
He replied, “nah man, I fucking hated myself.”
That is sad. Just fucking sad.
This is definitely something that feels all too common with queer people. I know it's certainly how I felt before coming out as trans, to where I'd want to share memes with my friend group but constantly policed myself worrying that somehow it would "tip them off" somehow. I was in a weird place of being extremely invested in trans issues while also being pretty transphobic at times, basically so no one would think I was so interested because I was trans or anything.
It definitely all led to a lot of tension and anger and a very poor state of mental health overall, and just fucking sucked having to put on such a shitty persona all the time to try and hide my true self.
He probably got brought up by very conservative parents. It's always the parents that fuxk up their kids the most.
Yep. His dad was a preacher and I never seen his mom wear anything but dresses that looked like they were pulled from a museum.
I'm somewhat sympathetic to folks like him, we all find our own way and some have a more direct path than others, but I do get frustrated how a lot of gay folks like that center themselves in their stories. They may have hated themselves most, but they hated the rest of us too, they may have been targeting themselves, but they hurt the rest of us too. They get big and loud when they're homophobic, but when they accept themselves many get small and quiet, when they've got some karma to work back.