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submitted 2 weeks ago by Blahaj_Blast to c/lgbtq_plus@beehaw.org

So, I realized a Lil while back, (2+y) I'm mtf trans. My spouse and I have been together ~16 years and now she's committed to seeing this through and seeing how things end up because she loves me, not my flesh necessarily. But, she's concerned because we grew up with a very strict, conservative, religious background and did always consider ourselves cishet.

She loves me for me, but is worried about the future and super curious about exploring her sexuality to figure out if she's as straight as she thought (she's also had some do I want her or to be her thoughts).

Main point is, does anyone have any suggestions for how she can explore and figure things out without opening the marriage, and preferably without porn?

I'm still struggling to understand the romantic and sexual attraction spectrums and where I fit in the, but she seems very high on the romantic spectrum as in, she can't imagine being intimate without a serious relationship.

I don't know. I'm just looking for options to help her figure herself out, and us out, while I figure myself out too.

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[-] dumples@midwest.social 2 points 2 weeks ago

I think anything that's let's you hear and think about sex and sexuality would help on exploring without any of the more porny aspects. I love Dan Savage podcast and column which is all about sex and relationships. Hearing about other people sex lives and problem will help you see a variety of different things about relationships structures, sex, kink and sexuality. Some will be interested in learning more others might give you the Ick. All good to know.

In a similar vein would be the standard kink and sex books. Those range from steamy to clinical in their handling. Worth checking books out

this post was submitted on 01 Aug 2025
33 points (100.0% liked)

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