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Parenting is just relentless
(lemmy.world)
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this post was submitted on 29 Jul 2025
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Parenting
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It's not meant to be, man.
I remember being a kid, back when people had kids early and grandparents were both still around and healthy enough to help. I used to spend full weekends at my grandma's, or at friends' places or with aunts and uncles and other relatives. And a bit later kids would get together and roam the streets in packs.
We made it so kids only get to hang out with their parents and must be under constant supervision and it's an entirely absurd proposition.
Yea, my mom was the most hands-on grandparent but she passed a couple years ago. The rest...very hands off. She was great when he was little but the funny thing is I don't ever remember her playing with me when I was a kid. When did we switch our mentality to just being so actively parenting all the time?
It's been a single generation, as I remember it. At least if you were born in the 80s/early 90s.
The average age to have a first child has skyrocketed and, particularly in some parts of the world, the idea of an extended family is no longer a thing. The support network has frayed a TON and the level of demand on parents has gone up at the same time.
And nobody seems to acknowledge it, honestly. At least outside bad faith fascistoid tradwife peddlers. But this isn't about traditional gender roles, it's about telling all parents that they need to constantly monitor their kids for two decades and simultaneously cutting them off from any source of help during that period (unless they're filthy rich and can pay for dedicated labor to replace that support).
It's not practical at all.
No wonder no one's having kids
It's to do with isolation. Those in power want us isolated and afraid.
Bruh, my mom actively made sure I was home, but wouldn't play with me. She and her subhuman husband at the time drank and smoked cigarettes in the house while listening to music and I was expected to play with my toys alone. The only time I got to hang out with my friends was during rigid playdates and before they got home. And that was only because they were absent.
But with my kid, she'll play pretend endlessly. However, I won't allow her to be alone with my son because of the subtle propaganda I remember as a kid. "you wouldnt want someone to make a living without doing anything for it, would you?" This is why Grammy isn't allowed around my child by herself. I honestly wish she would die already so I don't have to explain these complex things with him.