I thought this way for years. Turns out men actually want to be men, and I am much happier being a girl!
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Now explain trans men
this is pretty easy to explain! Men and trans men want to be men. Women and trans women want to be women! Non Binary folk aren't interested in claiming either gender. All are valid :) I hope that clears things up!
Non binary is a bit more nuanced though.
As an afab probable egg, I do think that many cis women might want to be men, just because of the patriarchy. I can’t find it, but there’s a quote I read somewhere about wishing that you could just go on adventures like men do (I have a hazy idea that it was from Sylvia Plath or Audrey Hepburn, but I can't search for clear enough terms to avoid pages and pages of slop). It stuck with me, because I think there are a lot of areas that women are (to varying degrees) locked out of. There are also lots of Mulan-type stories about afab people who pretend to be men for a period of time in order to do something they wouldn’t have been able to do as a woman, then go back to living as women. We obviously don’t know their feelings on gender, but that reads like they’re cis women to me.
In my opinion, wanting the benefits of the patriarchy is different than wanting to be a man, with the acknowledgement that there can be some overlap between the two. Where Mulan's military service was temporary and brought about by external pressures, a trans man likely would not need the threat of an elderly family member being drafted to war to make the change, nor want to go back to living as a woman. But at the same time I'm sure there are women like Mulan.
A bit like the older practice of women writers using abbreviated names or pseudonyms when publishing books because books written by men sold better.
It's crazy to me how unnecessarily gendered so many different industries still are, too. Professional cooking is still dominated by men but cooking at home is womanly. It makes no sense and it's maddening.
Yeah. I, cis woman, sit down once a year or so and ask myself a lot of questions (am I happy here, do I still want to be doing x) and one of them is, "am I a woman?" And the answer is "yes, despite how much this society makes that suck ass". In my head I'm a woman. I do wish I had way less tit. I might be getting that soon though. Cancer scares suck ass though.
I honestly can’t tell if I want to be a man, or if I don’t want people to think about my gender (which it seems like happens for men). I know I don’t want to be sexualized and I do want to be treated like “one of the boys” by everyone except my husband, but I can’t tell if it goes further than that. Luckily, I married a bi dude who’s down for whatever, so I don’t have to choose between us if I get a bunch more dysphoric in the future.
Yeah, I very much get the 'no one else should be thinking about my gender' thing. I'd like a nice slightly less decaying metal body and no one to perceive me unless I want them to!
can we please take care not to invalidate our trans brothers? They are valid no matter how much sense it might make to anyone else. egg memes aren't just for transfems.
didn't mean it like that. Was mostly just a passing comment.