I get it. You're convinced that global warming isn't a serious threat, or maybe you've just decided that it can't be because you're not willing to consider alternatives to how you live. That's why it's easy to invent a bunch of nonsense policy and pin it on a stranger. It makes it easy to pretend that you're the reasonable one in the room. I understand it, but it's still an idiotic position to take.

Here is some basic policy that Canada can and should adopt to combat climate change at the federal level. Some of it may well hurt the economy, but compared to the catastrophic damage the climate is already doing, it's nothing.

• Limiting the damage
  • Ban all expansion of oil and gas extraction. When your bathtub is overflowing, the first thing you do is turn off the tap.
  • Fine oil & gas firms for every abandoned well, then sue them for covering up the truth about global warming for decades and then for running disinformation campaigns about CO₂ after the truth came out.
• Energy
  • Invest in solar, wind, and hydro because it's cheap and fast to deploy. Much of this will have to come from China initially, but there's no reason why we shouldn't be trying to build this industry locally as well. Megaprojects should be championed as a national effort, and showcased to the world as Canada doing what needs to be done.
  • Leverage our many water systems to serve as flow batteries.
  • Offer subsidies for the insulation of homes and the conversion to heat pumps. Combine this with mandates for landlords that the homes they rent out are up to high efficiency standards.
• Transport
  • Ban short-haul flights, especially those between Toronto/Ottawa/Montréal, Victoria/Vancouver/Kelowna, and Calgary/Edmonton.
  • Charge more per-person per additional flight every year, so that your second flight from Vancouver to Toronto in the same year costs 20% more, your third flight, %40 more, etc.
  • End all federal funding for highway expansion, redirect it into grants for transit and active transport like cycling.
  • Require a commercial license for any vehicle larger than a 4-door sedan or weighing more than 1 tonne, and apply a nation wide speed limit of 30kph off the highway.
  • Limit all non-highways to no more than 2 car lanes. Give that extra space up to slower traffic like pedestrians, bikes, hell even golf carts.
  • Offer financing for e-bikes and cargo bikes or work with private banks to make this available.
  • Invest in intercity rail, ideally along those same short-haul flight corridors.
  • Limit the size of vehicles permitted on all roads and lay out a plan to reduce that size over time.
• Construction
  • Apply a 400% tax on any new big-box store development. They're terrible for the economy anyway, but they're also a terrible waste of resources.
  • Stem the expansion of suburban sprawl with the above traffic regulations and tax benefits for urban density.
  • Form a national housing agency for the federal government to start building homes again. The target for this agency should be densification, clustering around the transit initiatives mentioned above.
  • Support the production and use of concrete alternatives like hempcrete where possible.
• Food
  • Tax beef to gradually higher amounts, and subsidise alternatives -- even other meats. Chicken for example is leaps-and-bounds better for the climate than cow.
  • Support beef producers by helping them financially to transition to alternatives in exchange for agreeing to reduce their herd sizes every year.
• Foreign Policy
  • Build an alliance of other nations to operate as a trading bloc for countries living up to their climate agreements. Membership in the bloc awards reduced trading friction, while non-members are hit with tariffs.

I don't know where you got your three bananas ideas, but the above is a pretty good start for actual action on climate. Every one of these will improve quality of life, while the alternative is watching one city like Jasper go up in flames every year until it's two cities, or three. Major cities like Kamloops, or even Vancouver are definitely already at serious risk even now. What do you think the economic cost would be if we lost them too?