183

you are viewing a single comment's thread
view the rest of the comments
[-] copygirl 18 points 6 days ago

It isn't censorship if you get your post / comment removed or banned for breaking a rule. That's just the moderators / admins doing their job. And there's a subtext to saying "dragons aren't real", which is "I don't think I need to respect this person's identity or pronouns". That's why it's gatekeeping. You don't get to decide what identities / pronouns are valid or which rules apply to you because you think you made a good point.

[-] PhilipTheBucket@ponder.cat 30 points 6 days ago

It isn’t censorship if you get your post / comment removed or banned for breaking a rule.

Sure it is.

By my reading of the db0 terms of service, you’ve broken them here, because you are advocating for systems of authoritarian control and against the open discussion of ideas. Would you support banning your user from db0 so we can’t have this conversation? Is that censorship?

I don’t think you should get banned, of course. Because you’re clearly talking in good faith, and I like being able to talk with people, even when I disagree with them. I just would have a wish that the network as a whole generally works like that.

You don’t get to decide what identities / pronouns are valid

But the blahaj admins do! If I showed up and said my pronouns were “thatsaspicymeatball,” they would decide that wasn’t valid. They would not ban people for not using that as my pronouns, or for discussing the issue. They’ve just decided to make their judgement call in one particular place instead of another. That’s fine, of course, but then mechanically enforcing that everyone has to act in exact accordance with where they drew the line, even though there’s room for reasonable disagreement, is what will get people talking about you on PTB.

The reality of human life is that people look at things differently sometimes. I get wanting to protect your space against ignorance or people who will make someone feel unwelcome. But this is taking it to an extreme, forcing everyone to look at things in exactly the same chosen way, which is tearing down the thing you’re trying to accomplish, I think.

[-] copygirl 9 points 6 days ago

Does db0 have a ToS? I can see an "Anarchist Code of Conduct", which seems to only support my points. In addition, db0 Lemmy has its own rules that could be seen as censorship just the same. Pointing out either instance's rules existing presumably doesn't imply that I'm advocating for authoritarian control or against discussion of ideas.

If you said your pronouns were 19 characters long, then one would argue that it is no longer functioning as a pronoun. drag/drag, other than being exotic, works fine in place of a pronoun. (Though one could argue it is so unique it's more akin to a nickname, but that's another discussion to be had.) If you instead said your pronouns were that/that, and being serious about it, it would likely be accepted. Sure, you could argue it's a line being drawn elsewhere, but it's not on the matter of identity.

I know numerous people that use fae/faer pronouns, some friends. Fairies aren't real, either. Does that mean people should be allowed to make those same arguments, be allowed to openly be disrespectful and arguing against the use of those pronouns, in a space that explicitly asks you to respect them? No, of course not. Admittedly, I don't know anyone who isn't also okay with certain non-neopronouns being used for them as well, but if they weren't, I personally wouldn't think much about it and just use them.

[-] PhilipTheBucket@ponder.cat 21 points 6 days ago

In the code of conduct is:

Voluntary interaction, especially when it includes:

  • Inclusive language and behavior,
  • Welcoming attitude and approach,
  • Rational debate and discussion,
  • Genuine exchanges of ideas,

What is Unacceptable

  • Authoritarianism, or the spread of behavior that is designed to overturn the standards described so far

You could say that’s misleadingly trimmed. I was mainly just trying to make a point: Just because something is according to the written rules doesn’t make it right. Also, you’re currently coming into a space and violating its community standards, and no one is banning you, nor should they, I think. That is one way you can wind up talking with people even if at the outset they may not agree with you on everything.

If you said your pronouns were 19 characters long, then one would argue that it is no longer functioning as a pronoun.

You don’t get to decide what identities / pronouns are valid or which rules apply to you because you think you made a good point.

See how that works?

My point was that they’re exercising judgement already, as you would to my requested pronouns, because of course they are. Everyone who’s doing moderation has to exercise judgement.

[-] copygirl 8 points 6 days ago* (last edited 6 days ago)

you’re currently coming into a space and violating its community standards

If I'm truly violating db0's community standards, then I would like to know. And looking at the (A)CoC, I don't think I am.

See how that works?

"My pronouns are the entire bee movie script."
"My pronouns are they/them'); DROP TABLE Pronouns;--"
"My pronouns are an hour of silence followed by an ear-shattering scream."

Obviously there is a limit to what is reasonable to use as a (neo)pronoun, in line with the purpose of personal pronouns, and drag/drag is very much within acceptable limits, wheras "thatsaspicymeatball/thatsaspicymeatball" is not. Our opinions might differ, and that's okay, but you're not making a good argument for your side.

[-] PhilipTheBucket@ponder.cat 18 points 6 days ago

Making a “pronoun” that is a nickname makes it not a pronoun, grammatically. Also, this person isn’t actually a dragon, and them insisting that they are turns it into something very different from a person who wants to be referred to as a different gender or intersex or however they express themselves.

You could say that those are irrelevant issues, and the issue of length is a critical one, of course. Like you said I think our opinions are just different about it.

[-] copygirl 5 points 6 days ago

All that's being asked for is to accept everyone's pronouns. If you think someone is using joke pronouns – which again drag/drag is exotic but literally no extra effort to type than they/them – then you can report and let the mods and admins deal with it. Arguing "I don't need to respect this person's pronouns because dragons aren't real" is where you step into the realm of rule-breaking in this instance.

Feel free to read some of the experiences and opinions of other trans people in this thread. Notably, we don't all agree, but it's not all that out there as you're making it seem.

[-] PhilipTheBucket@ponder.cat 21 points 6 days ago

I think that’s the crux of the matter. I’m pretty confident that the person with the nick “dragonfucker” who identifies as a dragon and wants to use “drag” as their pronouns and also causes all kinds of other drama, is using joke pronouns. My reaction to it is pretty much the same as your reaction to the “thatsaspicymeatball” pronoun. You’re welcome to your opinion and to treat them any way you want to, but nothing I am saying would translate in any way to someone who wasn’t an internet stranger with about 10 different red flags that they were trolling.

[-] copygirl 5 points 6 days ago

I was saying that "thatsaspicymeatball" is impractical as a pronoun due to its length, and a result of that is likely a joke pronoun, reinforced by the fact that you made it up for that explicit purpose. You can't make that same claim about the use of "drag" as a pronoun. And again, thinking someone is trolling is still not a valid reason to disrespect their identity or pronouns (in Blåhaj Lemmy), for reasons already stated elsewhere.

[-] PhilipTheBucket@ponder.cat 15 points 6 days ago

If I’m truly violating db0’s community standards, then I would like to know. And looking at the (A)CoC, I don’t think I am.

Yes, but PugJesus truly didn’t think he was violating the community standards. He’s been explaining himself here, and getting treated like “the enemy” mostly because he’s trying to protect your community against someone he thinks is just trolling you and trying to hold you up to ridicule.

My point with this part was that there are communities that start jumping on the banhammer as soon as some reading of the community rules could define a person as the enemy, and that feels very different from the getting-banned side than it does from the banning-the-enemies side. You can probably imagine how it would feel if you got instance banned for the conversation we’ve had so far.

[-] copygirl 6 points 6 days ago

This is not the first time the drag/drag pronouns person came up (currently not sure what name they're going by) and it looks like the admins have previously made the decision to back them. Heck, perhaps to them, it's a good way to weed out people who can't understand why the rules are the way they are. Just like someone's ethnicity, age or appearance is irrelevant to discussions, neither are their identity or pronouns. If PugJesus is the person that got banned, then it appears they have yet to understand what they did wrong, and the ban appears to be warranted.

[-] princessnorah 3 points 6 days ago

...because he’s trying to protect your community...

Nobody asked him too, and it's quite paternalistic to believe that it's needed.

[-] PugJesus@lemmy.world 20 points 6 days ago

It isn’t censorship if you get your post / comment removed or banned for breaking a rule.

...

[-] copygirl 8 points 6 days ago

Alright I suppose it technically is censorship. I'm not a native English speaking person. You certainly shouldn't be surprised about a community's rules being enforced, though. I don't think it would be sensible to complain about "censorship" if (as an example) one is spouting bigoted nonsense at family dinner and is getting thrown out the house as a result.

[-] PugJesus@lemmy.world 23 points 6 days ago

I would say this is more like being told "No prejudice" at Thanksgiving Dinner, and then being thrown out for saying that mashed potatoes were a mistake of god.

It is technically prejudiced (against mashed potatoes), but it is not the assumption most people would have upon being told "No prejudice". Likewise, being told "Don't discriminate against anyone's gender identity" does not, for many, call to mind "Don't say people can't be dragons or that dragons aren't real, they can be dragons if they want".

this post was submitted on 28 Dec 2024
183 points (100.0% liked)

Ye Power Trippin' Bastards

527 readers
12 users here now

This is a community in the spirit of "Am I The Asshole" where people can post their own bans from lemmy or reddit or whatever and get some feedback from others whether the ban was justified or not.

Sometimes one just wants to be able to challenge the arguments some mod made and this could be the place for that.

Rules

Expect to receive feedback about your posts, they might even be negative.

Make sure you follow this instance's code of conduct. In other words we won't allow bellyaching about being sanctioned for hate speech or bigotry.


Some acronyms you might see.


Relevant comms

founded 4 months ago
MODERATORS