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Real Alpha Men™ drink their Vanilla Ice cream shake from a metal bucket while shirtless and listening to death metal
(slrpnk.net)
"Drinking a milkshake with a straw? Only a squishy lib would do such a thing."
More about Strawgate: https://www.usatoday.com/story/opinion/columnist/2024/09/05/tim-walz-milkshake-masculinity-jesse-watters-straw-fox-news/75089097007/
Alpha males don't drink a milkshake with a straw, they give it their whole mouth, open up their throat and don't forget to work the balls.
This also the way they drink bubble tea, poke an opening, then work the hole with their tongue to get the pearls out.