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[TW] Dating (self.mtf)
submitted 3 months ago by MicrondeMMMMMMM to c/mtf
19 comments fedilink hide all child comments

Sorry this is a bit of a depressing subject but I've been feeling down and I kinda want to interact with ppl online.

Basically I'm feeling down because the girl I liked (I'm not out to her) is very likely into another girl (she's bi).

I never dated in my entire life, mostly because I feel like a freak and don't want to seem like a pervert trying to flirt with a girl. I don't know why I feel like this, but it's really taking a toll on me because if even as a relatively attractive guy I couldn't find anyone, how the hell can I find someone now?

I know T4T exists but there are so few trans women where I live, and the queer community is tiny here. I feel like I'll always be a second option to cis women(genital preference) and it just feels bad. I'm scared I'll end up alone. Moreover the HRT is making me crave intimacy so that adds to the pile...

Anyone feels like this too and found how to deal with it?

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[-] blackboxwarrior@lemmy.ml 17 points 3 months ago

I’m sorry to hear you’re going through this qt, it can be really tough. I found myself in a similar spot when I transitioned and moved to a rural area. It’s been two years since then and i’m extremely happy in a T4T relationship.

On “feeling like a freak,” yeah, I get that. It sucks to feel that way. Part of that perception changes with time as hormones do their thing and you fit more into a feminine role… part of it doesn’t go away. I think it’s important to realize that if people are around you and being friendly they likely don’t think you’re a freak, and acting as if they do will just make it awkward. You’re not a pervert for being trans and liking cis women. Be confident and love yourself.

Feel free to reach out if you need someone to talk to <3 all will be alright.

[-] MicrondeMMMMMMM 7 points 3 months ago

Thanks a lot! 💖

I think it’s important to realize that if people are around you and being friendly they likely don’t think you’re a freak

That's helpful thank you! I've got a pretty big network of friends, I'm terrified at the idea of trying to flirt with one and destroying whatever relationship we had.

Be confident and love yourself.

That's not easy to do, I should probably go talk to a therapist about it, my self confidence has always been in the toilet, it's getting a bit better with hrt I think.

this post was submitted on 12 Aug 2024
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