"President for life"

monkey's paw moment.

At work, you're better off being a procrastinator or just generally slow. If you're fast and reactive, you'll be called lazy when you're sitting there with nothing left to do 😤

This is where I would blurt out the obscure fact and then realize I heard them wrong

"Did you know that figs are pollinated only when a certain species of wasp dies inside of it?"

"Wtf are you talking about? I said TIG! I'm certified in TIG welding!"

My cabbages!

International Man of Warcrimes

I don't think we're taking this problem seriously enough. This is not going to be fixed with signs.

They are getting really good at listening to their mother cherry pick bible verses that tell them why everyone else is evil.

Things like this move me to imagine a world completely devoid of ads. "But how would you discover a product you didn't know you needed?" I don't care. I would go without that product. That is preferable to me.

Lemmywinked

Because.. the site winked.. out of existence for a minute?

Some day in the distant future (the year 2000!)

Green cap as new symbol of support? We definitely can't wear red ones anymore.

"3% COLA this year from the State"

Poor guy doesn't know who is underpaying him, nor who is overcharging him.

Anger is more useful than despair -- by Terminator