Damn I'm sorry. The only thing I can suggest is to give her space, as much as you can. You don't deserve this.

If you have any kind of support system outside of her, now is the time. I would stay off Facebook. Trying to do damage control there with a conservative family is probably going to do more harm than good.

It's going to hurt more before it gets better, but with time and some effort, it can get better. Care for the kids as best you can. Then care for yourself as best you can. Then care for your wife.

You have every chance of being a pretty woman. It make take hormones and time and hair removal, and maybe some makeup magic, but there will probably come a day when you can be proud of what you see in the mirror.

Regardless, who you see in the mirror is more important. Do your best, and the rest will fall as it may.

“(your) right To swing your fist ends just where my nose begins”

Exactly, If you care so much transplant it into your uterus.

Hard dissagree. It's wrong in Nebraska, wrong in Germany, and wrong everywhere else where the standard is some date before birth.

What's the problem with 28 weeks?

Yes, it's clear that there must be a cutoff date. Personally, I like the biblical standard: baby's first breath.

I can't say this is something I have experienced. I got gender euphoria from the start right up to today.

But maybe you are gender fluid? If that fits then it fits. It's OK to be a man on Tues and a woman on Friday.

There is no wrong way to be you. There is only you. The words are only important if they are useful. When words fail, you are still here, and you are more important than the words will ever be.

It's OK to tell a story to simplify it down to strangers. (Like: I'm a trans woman) You don't need to have the whole experience of your transition down to an elevator speech.

I say this to give some guidance on how you could move through the world. Strangers get the simple lie. Friends and family get the more nuanced truth.

Your mother is saying nonsense. My mom knew I liked girls when I was 4. She thought that was normal, because I'm a trans woman, but it was obvious even then.

I'm sorry. You don't deserve invalidation. You deserve affirmation. You don't owe your mother anything, but it's possible that your dad or a grandparent can be an ally for you with the rest of the family.

How can you tell them? I don't know. "Hey, I have something important to tell you." Will probably force the issue.

You don't have to come out, but if you want to, that's how I would start.

I'm sorry for how your family reacted.

My mother cried. It was hard. She tried to deny it. I was really hoping she would help me and even be happy for me, but she was devastated. She said she would always love me and she didn't call me any names, but that was the best I got for years.

My aunt and Uncle, who I was working for at the time, were just kinda shocked. They gave a tepid "we hope this makes you happy."

All my friends were cool. Nearly all my coworkers were cool. A couple years later, when I came out to my new job to transition full time, management was super cool. They did everything I asked and used my new name from day one.

I had some rough spots, lost touch with some of my family. But overall I was prepared for much worse. Many years later, my mother, aunt, and uncle, were much warmer and supportive at my wedding.

So all's well that ends well.

I found Lemmy in a comment thread wishing for reddit alternatives.

I worry that the decentralized nature of the fediverse will require some thick skin for a time. I have seen the sentiment expressed that we don't want too many federations(edit: defederations) when the community is still so small.

If the community grows, I imagine we will see options for safe spaces, but there will need to be constant vigilance, because the change of a mod or a mod's beliefs can change what content is allowed.

Still, it's early enough for me to have hope.

Thank you so much! I found it.

I'm so confused.

Hey Sarah. It's OK to be she/her for a bit. I hope you settle down with what makes you happy.

Not all anarchists are worth celebrating.