Bowser, Super Mario RPG

For the first time in a long time, I have a woman asking me if I want to meet for a coffee.

I'd love to, but some fucking moron decided to dig without calling first and busted open a water main for the whole neighborhood and now I can't even take a shower. I am about to go to the store to buy a bunch of jugs of water just so I can flush the toilet.

No timeline on when it's going to be fixed, either.

Sometimes it really feels like the universe just likes to spit in my fucking face and then laugh at me.

This is where the party ends
I can't stand here listening to you
And your racist friend
I know politics bore you
But I feel like a hypocrite talking to you
And your racist friend

It was the loveliest party that I've ever attended
If anything was broken I'm sure it could be mended
My head can't tolerate this bobbing and pretending
Listen to some bullet-head and the madness that he's saying

This is where the party ends
I'll just sit here wondering how you
Can stand by your racist friend
I know politics bore you
But I feel like a hypocrite talking to you
You and your racist friend

This is where the party ends
I can't stand here listening to you
And your racist friend
I know politics bore you
But I feel like a hypocrite talking to you
And your racist friend

Out from the kitchen to the bedroom to the hallway
Your friend apologizes, he could see it my way
He let the contents of the bottle do the thinking
Can't shake the devil's hand and say you're only kidding

This is where the party ends
I can't stand here listening to you
And your racist friend
I know politics bore you
But I feel like a hypocrite talking to you
And your racist friend

This is where the party ends
I can't stand here listening to you
And your racist friend
I know politics bore you
But I feel like a hypocrite talking to you
And your racist friend

It was the loveliest party that I've ever attended
If anything was broken I'm sure it could be mended
My head can't tolerate this bobbing and pretending
Listen to some bullet-head and the madness that he's saying

This is where the party ends
I'll just sit here wondering how you
Can stand by your racist friend
I know politics bore you
But I feel like a hypocrite talking to you
You and your racist friend

This is where the party ends
I can't stand here listening to you
And your racist friend
I know politics bore you
But I feel like a hypocrite talking to you
And your racist friend

Out from the kitchen to the bedroom to the hallway
Your friend apologizes, he could see it my way
He let the contents of the bottle do the thinking
Can't shake the devil's hand and say you're only kidding

This is where the party ends
I can't stand here listening to you
And your racist friend
I know politics bore you
But I feel like a hypocrite talking to you
And your racist friend

Oh I can still remember
Jenny Hernando
She was my little lovely one
When I was seventeen
I remember the day that she
Gave me her virginity
And then she gave it to everyone
In our vicinity

Oh I can still remember
Julie Tolentino
The dancing Filipino
We used to run around
Her and Flouncin' Freddy
Were going hot and steady
Now she runs a dyke bar
The biggest one in town

I can still remember my
Old friend Todd Squellati
I watching him snort a
Milkshake right up his nose
He slurped it up the left side
Blew it out the right side
How he ever kept it down
I will never know

Of course I still remember
Ol' Flouncin' Freddy
We were pumping gas
Down at El Sobrante Shell
His Mustang was his pride 'n' joy
He liked to dance the cowboy
He'd hang out at Jack In the Box
But eat at Taco Bell

Oh I can still remember
Jenny Hernando
She was my little lovely one
When I was seventeen
I remember the day that she
Gave me her virginity
And then she gave it to everyone
In our vicinity

Oh I can still remember
Julie Tolentino
The dancing Filipino
We used to run around
Her and Flouncin' Freddy
Were going hot and steady
Now she runs a dyke bar
The biggest one in town

I can still remember my
Old friend Todd Squellati
I watching him snort a
Milkshake right up his nose
He slurped it up the left side
Blew it out the right side
How he ever kept it down
I will never know

Of course I still remember
Ol' Flouncin' Freddy
We were pumping gas
Down at El Sobrante Shell
His Mustang was his pride 'n' joy
He liked to dance the cowboy
He'd hang out at Jack In the Box
But eat at Taco Bell

I run my mouth and it's not great
But you broke my heart on my birthday
You said, "Don’t cry, you're making this harder"
Well goddamn you're just like your father

But if I beg you, would you stay with me?
And if I stay up, would you lay with me?
In the morning you can leave again
And I promise I won’t lose my shit
Call all my friends, call off the wedding
Leave me at the altar, give me a good ending
'Cause you're a good man, you do everything right
And when I get psychotic you don't put up a fight
But you need a vacation, a break from my love
'Cause I'm always wasted and I need too much
With my splintering syntax, hysterical grammar
Parenthetical sadness, it doesn't really matter
I'm not a runaway bride, wasn’t born for deceiving
I love you too much, I’m no good at leaving

Who's gonna hold you now?
I won’t wait around to find out
Who's gonna get you high?
Let you take the stars from their eyes
Baby please, it's not gonna be me
You should get a ride home
From someone who loves you

Did you show up just to hurt me?
Just to waste my time, or just to look at me?
Did you think that I would beg you?
Did you wanna make me cry?
Oh, what a tragedy

'Cause life’s so sweet and my friends adore me
Honestly, baby, you bore me now
I'm having fun again
One more time just so you remember
No one's gonna do the things I did to you
And when you come back

I'm gonna make you crawl
It's dangerous to get what you want
Who's gonna calm you down?
You always got so nervous in a crowd
Baby, why do you look so tired?
You should get a ride home
From someone who loves you

Is this a worthy goodbye?
You drained the sun from my sky
To light up the halo above you
Well, God help the next girl that loves you

I run my mouth and it's not great
But you broke my heart on my birthday
You said, "Don’t cry, you're making this harder"
Well goddamn you're just like your father

But if I beg you, would you stay with me?
And if I stay up, would you lay with me?
In the morning you can leave again
And I promise I won’t lose my shit
Call all my friends, call off the wedding
Leave me at the altar, give me a good ending
'Cause you're a good man, you do everything right
And when I get psychotic you don't put up a fight
But you need a vacation, a break from my love
'Cause I'm always wasted and I need too much
With my splintering syntax, hysterical grammar
Parenthetical sadness, it doesn't really matter
I'm not a runaway bride, wasn’t born for deceiving
I love you too much, I’m no good at leaving

Who's gonna hold you now?
I won’t wait around to find out
Who's gonna get you high?
Let you take the stars from their eyes
Baby please, it's not gonna be me
You should get a ride home
From someone who loves you

Did you show up just to hurt me?
Just to waste my time, or just to look at me?
Did you think that I would beg you?
Did you wanna make me cry?
Oh, what a tragedy

'Cause life’s so sweet and my friends adore me
Honestly, baby, you bore me now
I'm having fun again
One more time just so you remember
No one's gonna do the things I did to you
And when you come back

I'm gonna make you crawl
It's dangerous to get what you want
Who's gonna calm you down?
You always got so nervous in a crowd
Baby, why do you look so tired?
You should get a ride home
From someone who loves you

Is this a worthy goodbye?
You drained the sun from my sky
To light up the halo above you
Well, God help the next girl that loves you