Hello Friends! I just realised I haven't posted or logged in a much longer period of time than I thought. I hope you're all well! For once I'm not here to vent or complain. Lol.
Stopped the car at the zebra crossing by South Melbourne Market and who happens to cross in front of the car but my ex, that ex, the one who never spoke to me again. My initial thought was WTF and then my heart did that pain thing it does and then I got teary eyed and then I felt completely okay about it. It didn't give me this burning desire to talk to her, it didn't make me miss her, it just reminded me of the pain she caused me and then I moved on. Also to note I was not driving. lol. Thank god.
I am officially diagnosed with ADHD combined type! After waiting so long for my appointment and feeling so anxious that I was somehow wrong about it, it's a huge relief. I get to try medication and looking forward to the bonus weightloss that comes from it lol
Going to both of Lizzos concerts were the perfect end to a what has been a fucking hard year, they encapsulated every bit of happiness, heartbreak, pain, learning, and growth I've had through this time and reminded me of how much I love her and myself.
Spent so much of the day exhausted, I decided just to use my seated ticket and I'm super happy with it, the view is great.
I've started an 8 week challenge for fitness and healthy eating and fuck me, the amount of admin involved is exhausting. I've been so enthusiastic but the more I've had to prepare for it food wise, the more my enthusiasm fades. I'll still go to the group training session tonight but I'm genuinely already exhausted.
I just wanted to reiterate how nice it is to not be feeling hurt/pain about my break up anymore, I'm sure there will be moments but I'm just feeling so overall positive and happy. I'm feeling ready to put myself out there and start dating again and just go with the flow.
I'm super proud of how much healing and learning I've done in the last year, I've changed so much and definitely for the better. I've made more friends, I work hard to prioritise my social life and to keep those relationships going so that an actual relationship is just a supplement to my life.
I'm excited to get my adhd assessment done and my diagnosis soon and to keep learning. I'll head back to therapy once I have my tax return and just keep trying to make some positive steps to be my best.
I got my Lizzo drawing printed on a jumper. I'm super happy with it and will be curious to see how the T-shirt and bag versions turn out whenever they arrive!
Image description: black jumper with rainbow illustrations of US Singer Lizzo on it, a flute, and the name Lizzo repeated 6 or 7 times.
I just have to actually celebrate myself, my friend let slip at dinner that my ex has a girlfriend and has for a while and I'm not sad or hurt about it at all. Which is HUGE. I'm so fucking proud of the progress I've made emotionally.
Thank you for the kind words earlier Friends, I'm feeling a lot more okay now. Sometimes my brain gets carried away.
I did things that cheered me up and that really helped, made some cheesy potato cake thingys and planted one of my propagated monsteras in a pot and changed the pot of another plant and that all made me feel better. I'll have to relax tonight and put a face mask on and do some graphic design/drawing so I can get my Lizzo T-shirt and/or bag done in time.
In hindsight, I really wish I'd just posted this yesterday:
All of my best responses are well after I've already sent them.
I forgot to post after my return post but I'm here, I've got all good news, I started a polymer clay jewellery business - I haven't had any sales yet but I'll get there eventually. I'm also really enjoying/experiencing the benefits of ADHD medication, it's wonderful having a clear brain for a good chunk of the day.