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This is very true. You sow the seeds and later get the benefits and confidence. My sister's and I finally figured out that the father that raised us and protected us is a weak, vain hypocrite that takes all his emotional cues from his wife. My dead mother was far smarter, more compassionate ... I realised this in adulthood.
Life is a shit show with a thousand setbacks and blows to confidence, insecurity. But I'm pleased that my idiot dad and his judgemental megalomaniac bitch wife of 15 years aren't calling me up to fuck with me (or tell my sister how little she's achieved (with his criticism and absence of financial help).
The other day I even came to terms with not attending his funeral - you really don't have to feel guilty. Whatever separation you feel is necessary will be necessary.