...the army of my moronic country has killed thousands of peaceful Ukrainian civilians, foreign media have been writing for a whole year that this country wants to start a war with NATO in 2025.

I'm really sorry, I don't know what to do... I constantly live in stress, anxiety, with a feeling of hopelessness, depression, I'm procrastinate a lot...

Normal people, in principle, do not live in this country. My mother does not consider me to be a person, as, in principle, most ruSSians (these mad dogs) treat each other.

I've read the post and guessed the country right. Hello, fellow inmate. Sorry you share this faith.

Coding is a good investment in the future, you can read most sources on it too, so you are set. But that takes a lot of resilence to keep on going. I have many troubles with that, and I'm not well in the head too.

There are many little factories and businesses around that hire with a little to no experience and pay you hard cash. I'd consider that in order to fall from the radar. No medical bonuses but like they are worth it. It would occupy you and bring you a starting budget.

After getting some trust in yourself, you can try asking around other places. Shops are good too and they are constantly hiring. People also work in apps, but I've not heard anyone getting it big on them.

Freelance is another way, but you need skills. Writing works for others, doing arts on demand, checking items on e-shops, whatever. These pay peanuts, but generally easy to start if your hands know the tools.

If anything, get some way to distract youself would worth it too. People (the cooler ones), media, charities, hobbies. They are what keeps me going in spite of anxiety.

Also, some psychotherapists seem to work and be open, but you need locals who used them tell which ones since that's a total hit-and-miss. Investigating VK groups can be a start. Expect it to be a private and paid one though. And more chances in big cities, obviously.

Переживи деда, друг.

Sorry to hear.

Getting a valuable skill would probably be the best way to improve your life

Unfortunately, I think your best move would be to flee the country by any means necessary. Do you have any relatives or friends who live abroad? Even if you are sleeping on a air mattress on someone's living room floor, it would be an improvement. I do not think the conditions in your home country will improve anytime soon.

I was about to suggest programmation but I reread and found out about the "no-computer" situation...

Skills are just a development of a thing you practice. Get good at something you have some love for. Things like programming, mathematics, interpretation are very valuable things to be competent with, and can develop into many useful skills. But anything can be useful, if you practice it enough. Some things, usually art-centric skills tend to be a lot more difficult to use to earn money in my experience.

But take this advice from a former slacker: apply yourself to something and you'll be rewarded.

Sadly, many many people, even in first world countries, struggle to attain financial stability their entire lives, and unfortunately most never do. But do not give up hope.

Do you have any friends or family in another country that can help you and your mother figure out how to legally leave your country to move to another as soon and affordably as possible? It may be an awkward phone call or letter or any way to communicate, but it is important to take this into real consideration. Sometimes a big change is necessary to make your opportunities in life more favorable to you.

How willing are you to work? If you think "there are jobs that I simply cannot do," why do you think you cannot do them? Is it a legal or physical limitation, or is it because "I don't want to?" Take any jobs you can, even if its not the job you want. Work hard and work often. You will probably have to take multiple jobs. See if you can help your mother to find work also.

Find a hobby you like. Not all hobbies cost money, some are as simple as star gazing. Whatever it is that you find interesting or enjoyable, try to do that in your spare time often. Hobbies can help you relax and take your mind off of daily worries. They can help improve your mental health, at least until you can afford a medical professional.

I won't sugarcoat it, you have a tough road ahead of you. But put in the hard work and its possible you can change your situation. If you never believe you can change it and you never try, then you never will. But if you believe you can, and you try very hard, then maybe you can. A man can only get to his destination if he walks there, right? He won't be going anywhere if he never moves.

People have already offered you some good advice and I just want to send hugs and love from a fellow Mordorian.

I think before you start something, you may want to balance your mental state first. Not improving but balancing it would be a good start. I know that would be hard without proper medication and care, but still.

What worked for me was having several days or even weeks off Internet, social media, and being as far away from other people as possible. To avoid drama (you might know what I'm talking about), I would invent some reason to stay alone that wouldn't raise suspicions in them like having to study or help a friend with some project. Then I would try to focus entirely on my body not thoughts, maybe take a walk or listen to fav bands in a way when you let music replace your thoughts so that it becomes your thoughts.

Actually, this resembles all that meditation shit, and sometimes it helps. Your goal is a detached attitude that you can use to make plans without having to consider any unnecessary feelings.

Once again, you're not alone, I love you, and more people around are open to love than you think.

1. learn punctuation.