I used to hate asparagus, but turns out it's because my mom and grandma would always boil it.
Pro-tip: don't do that, it's awful.
I didn't even think you could do that to asparagus. That's seriously demonic.
Same with Brussel sprout. My step-dad would boil them. Tastes like a soggy sulfur fart. But cut them in half, toss them in a bit of oil, salt and pepper, roast them until crispy in the oven with, and they're delicious. Oddly sweet, even. Try with other seasonings to enhance further.
Blanche and shock are the only way I actually like asparagus.
I can tolerate a baked or sauteed spear, but the margin for error is too damned small, and either side of it makes it unpalatable.
The real reason is that unhealthy food contains ingredients that were rarer for our ancestors to obtain. Dense caloric food meant surviving a winter, but our winter never comes.
My mom after feeding me canned green beans for years watching me wolf down green beans at my house
"You hated veggies when you were a kid."
...sure, mom
I looked my mother in the eyes after a long day once and responded to a similar statement with "No, I hated your chilli when I was a kid."
She really does make the absolute worst chilli I've ever tasted. It's so bland. There is almost no chilli powder in it, just some salt and a little bit of pre-ground pepper from a packaged salt/pepper shaker. The recipe amounts to "throw some hamburger and tomato sauce with canned beans in a pot and cook it for an hour and then add random amounts of all THREE seasonings"
It's a wonder I survived to be able to cook on my own.
My kids are the opposite. We can sauté up some fresh green beans and make them so good, but the kids only want to eat the canned ones.
No! Salt kills you, cooking kills vitamins and when you think you do everything right, then your vegetables don't have good enough quality and don't have enough nutritients. Eating healthy means to suffer, deal with it!!! /s
Or just dont overcook/boil your veggies. Everything in moderation.
Some of us grew up with terrible cooks. Properly cooked broccoli was a religious experience for me.
Because you are designed to seek out salt and sugar as a survival trait; then decided to mass produce it and put it into everything. Now your tastebuds have been ruined, even the standard apple/banana has been genetically modified to have more sugar
Genetically modified? That's a stretch.
Like many other cultures, bananas and apples were selectively reproduced to obtain fruits with more to eat. Corn, carrots, every single kale and cabbage, potatoes, oranges and even strawberries can go into this basket.
The wild banana has almost nothing to eat, being filled with large seeds and we can still find wild apples, by nature very tart but still edible. Every single cereal we plant and harvest today was originally nothing more than a wild grass.
But to call the work of millenia and who knows how many generations of farmers genetic modifications is a bit over the top.
GMOs are very recent introductions and normally for obtaining pest, drought or disease (more) resistant plants.
We absolutely genetically modified pretty much all of our food. We just did it by selective breeding.
The only difference with modern GMO is we've learned to do it directly much faster. We don't need a random mutation to add a trait anymore.
White people conquered the whole world looking for spices and then decided they didn't want to use any of them
Im of Scottish, Irish, and South German descent my ancestors didnt conquer shit beyond the whole bursting into flames under direct sunlight problem.
"Oh my God!" - God
I think God is, by definition, an atheist, though, since God must not believe in a higher power.
Anybody trying to tell me that sauteed veggies taste as good as a hamburger has lost from the beginning.
Honestly fresh veggies sautéed right are better than any hamburger, and I love to eat meats
Maybe you just need to find the right veggies or the right seasoning. I wouldn't say I love veggies more or less than a burger, but they add much needed variety.
I’m also a meat eater but have to disagree with you there. I prefer variety because eating the same salty slop gets boring. Maybe you have abused your tastebuds . If you take a break from certain foods it recalibrates the taste buds.
Never forget, wars were fought for spice. people died to not have to consume bland food.
and yet you pass the spice aisle every grocery visit, shame.
;)
The spice must flow
I still don't understand why the cooking skill of my parents sucked this bad. I started cooking on my own when I moved out and even after just a bit of practise and good recipes you can cook tasty meals. How do you go on 50 years failing this, I don't understand. If I see another bowl of dry rice, canned peas and ready marinated chicken from some discounter I'm going to throw up.
Boomers came up as fast food franchises and convenience foods began to dominate. The equal rights movement meant more women in the workplace and less in the kitchen and instead of spreading the burden, capitalism filled in the gaps.
Another explanation is that American cuisine got wrecked by the Great Depression. Everything that had flavor was expensive. People's inability to purchase and make certain foods stopped generational transfer of knowledge on how to make certain things. Thankfully, after several generations it's finally recovering.
"Ethnic" food (non European) wasn't as affected as much.
I heard an interview about a book on it a few years ago but now I can't find it.
So the question is...
Who was he referring to when he said "oh my god"?
I would have written that as "oh my me"
I just spent Thanksgiving with my family, and was reminded how much my parents love boiling things. Fucking disgusting, no spices either? Fuck bland potatoes. It takes almost no effort to just toss a bunch of fucking spices on them and then put them in the oven.
For lazy people like me: air fryer works great for asparagus and broccoli, taste good even with only salt.
As a lazy person who grew up with a parent who's method of cooking vegetables was just "boil it till its grey!", if a vegetable can be eaten raw, I will be eating it raw.
Raw broccoli dipped in garlic greek yoghurt is delicious, nutritious and fast/lazy to prepare.
I'm on the hunt for a vegan alternative that is decent, but until then, crunchy carrots and sugar snap peas are my go-to lazy veggies.
Also don't boil your vegetables. I was raised in boiled broccoli and sprouts, and steaming baskets changed my life!
All these air fryer, broiler, sautéing, and other methods...
Y'all forgot about microwaves. Microwaves and veggies are amazing. Broccoli, carrots, etc. Microwave until a fork still has a little resistance. Add a spot of sour cream or honey and dill... Or something. Tada. So fast. So yummy.
Okay I microwave veggies a lot because it's convenient but we cannot pretend that the fart cloud created by microwaved broccoli is in anyway close to the delicious crispyness of stir fried or baked broccoli
Oh, god's one of those assholes.
Image Transcription:
A four-panel Mr. Lovenstein comic titled "THIS COMIC MADE POSSIBLE THANKS TO EELS OF WOOD"
The first panel shows an angry pink humanoid standing on a green circle, holding a bunch of asparagus spears and speaking to a yellow-skinned, bearded humanoid barely in the panel. The pink humanoid is saying "HEY GOD, WHY DID YOU MAKE HEALTHY FOOD TASTE BAD?"
The second panel shows the yellow-skinned, bearded humanoid in more detail. It has a halo and is wearing a white robe. It's rolling its eyes angrily as it responds "OH MY GOD! DO I HAVE TO SHOW YOU EVERYTHING?"
The third panel shows the still-angry yellow-skinned humanoid cooking the asparagus spears in a frying pan over the open flame of a gas stove as the pink humanoid watches on amazed. The yellow humanoid is saying "SAUTÉ 'EM AND DON'T FORGET THE SEASONING! STIR AND TASTE AS YOU COOK!"
The final panel shows a close-up of the pink humanoid holding a half-eaten asparagus spear with its mouth full and eyes wide in awe as it says "IT'S... DELICIOUS!" A response from off-screen replies "OF COURSE IT IS!"
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Seriously though I’m amazed at how many people don’t understand basic cooking and how easy and necessary it is to take interest in self health and basic nourishment. But then get shocked when their organs start to shut down before 50. Like “omg they are trying to kill us all with salt and sugar in fast food” shouldn’t be a shock anymore. It’s capitalism. That’s how it works. They don’t care about your body.
Steam broccoli and cauliflower together in a microwave or steamer of your choice with butter and whatever seasonings you like. Toss in a wok with ripping hot olive oil until golden brown on the edges. Make sure to be rough with the broccoli and cauliflower, you want it to be crushed a bit. Shit slaps and it so easy. Idk if it's healthy anymore after all the butter and oil but whatever. you can adjust the butter levels as needed but make sure there's enough oil in the wok
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