Yeah, those first years can be pretty rough. I showed signs and kinda knew as early as 13, but didn't get a chance to act on it until college, and I wouldn't be able to come out til I was in my 20s.

I actually have drag to thank for making me realize I could transition at all. My first ever show had a transmasc drag king, and was right before a community education set held by the drag artists. After he explained why he had a real beard and opened the floor for questions, someone asked if a person could transition to male and perform as a drag queen instead. The whole crew gave a resounding yes and explained the difference between gender and personal style, as well as other nuances. But as someone who genuinely thought I wasn't allowed to be a guy because I love femme clothing, makeup, jewelry, etc., that was so important for me to hear. I knew it was allowed for "cis" people, and I knew about trans women, but I was stuck in "still cis tho" mode.

As far as the OP question goes, I do want to clarify that, while I don't think the starter pack applies to all femboys, there are a lot of shared experiences and lingo that is constantly being added to as more people become comfortable with being visibly queer and femme in ways they historically haven't. And I honestly love that. I may not have gotten the spinny skirt, but I always smile seeing that joy of someone wearing something they enjoy. We need more queer joy in the world.