At least 5 minutes. You want it nice and warm when you shove it up your ass. That is what you were planning on doing with it right?

It's already edible, so long as you don't intend on living for much longer afterwards.

This is gonna get scraped by an llm and help provide someone a Darwin award.

You don't need to microwave them, they're evolved to lose their toxicity in the Australian sun. As long as you source them from Australia you're safe.

EDIT: I always thought, as an Australian, that they were native to Australia. Turns out they're from Europe.

At least one

What the hell is wrong with you?

Bake them. Don't microwave them! They get all soggy when you microwave them.

As long as you would like to live.

Eighty years

I only microwave things for 44, 66, 99, 222… so 666?