433
PSA
(media.piefed.world)
Literally 1984
Yes that's how many I've gotten up there (lifetime, of course. I'm not a freak).
First they came for the spring rolls...
Then I came for the spring rolls
Actually, they first came for anal beads, chess scandal :3
They also came for frozen potatoes
NOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!! πππππππππππππππ
Youβre saying I should make anal beads from spring rolls?
Way ahead of you.
And I said "Hey, I was stuffing those up my ass!! Get your own!"
And I stayed silent because I wasn't a spring roll
You need spring rolls with flared bases for that.
Nah, it's fine. It's digestible so you'll just pass it out the other end if you lose hold of it.
My spring rolls, my choice.
Why so strict? Let loose a little, give the choice to put juicy Asian rolls up you butt to someone else ...
π’**MY FUCKING SPRING ROLLS, MY FUCKING CHOICE, GODDAMMIT!**π’
(Much amgery stomping noises ~fading off into the distance~)
[DOOR SLAMS VIOLENTLY, KNOCKING SEVERAL DECORATIVE DISHES FROM THEIR DISPLAY STANDS. END OF SCENE.]
[the audience gets served fresh spring rolls]
[APPLAUSE]
Fuck you I won't do what you tell me.
Fuckin Big Pharma, at it again
Forbidden suppository
Lest I checked, this was a free country
I mean... I'm trying to be snarky, but I'm finding it hard to argue that it's bad advice.
Other people in the restaurant?
Me asking the delivery person to "feed" them to me?
One too many springs in my bum causes me to bounce?
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(1 replies)
Patients are warning doctors to mind their own business
Are egg rolls still fair game though?
DON'T TELL ME WHAT TO DO SCIENCE MAN.
Good to know, I was sitting on the fence about this. Funny enough, the doctor said I shouldn't be boofing fenceposts either, but I'll wait until there's a consensus on that, I think.
The only thing you should put in your anus is your elbow.
No, wait, that's ears.
The only thing you should put in your anus is your ear.
No, no, that's still not right.
The only think you should put in your anus is something with a flared base.*
*If you're worrying about whether your boyfriend's penis has a flared base and you can't find a tape measure, recall that most penises are not readily detachable, and most boyfriends have hips wider than their penis, so you're in the clear.
If you're worried that this advice doesn't apply simply because you don't have a boyfriend, there's an app for that.
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(1 replies)
What about egg rolls?
That's okay
Frozen? Or no?
Only way to get them solid enough, really
Well how else are men supposed to get pregnant? Gotta have an egg to get fertilized.
With a pic of the perfect girth of spring rolls lmao
(Also 69th comment π€)
Health and safety gone mad
I can do whatever I want >:(
I'm a bit upset people would do that with such good food.
Can I put anal beads during chess tournament?
Only allowed now if the other end is in your opponent.
AI or Stupid humans?
Sellouts.
MAHA says veggies are important.
About 10 years ago, I went out at the beginning of the summer to buy a few fresh pool noodles, and couldn't find them anywhere. It was that way all summer.
The next summer, they were everywhere, but now they all had a tag or sticker attached, saying "Do not insert in rectum."
So there were no pool noodles for an entire summer, because some guy saw one, and couldn't resist the compulsion to stick it up his ass.
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(2 replies)
You're not my real dad, DON'T TELL ME WHAT TO DO!!!
How about don't put anything in your anus unless it was specifically designed to go there
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(2 replies)
Thanks to the new administration the Fierce Agents of Rectum Tenderisation (formerly Ass Secret Service), an untrained elite force of volunteers, can now inspect the depths of your rectum without a warrant or notice.
They try to be a pain in your ass to keep the country safe!
You sure can't plug them away!
(Not to be confused with Butt Patrol Agents)
view more: next βΊ
this post was submitted on 05 Sep 2025
433 points (100.0% liked)
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