I solved this by selling my house and outsourcing all those bullshit problems to the landlord.

If you need to hire a tradesperson, find small companies, folks who work for themselves. We're WAY cheaper than the shops are and can usually a) make time for you and b) work with you on it all. Plus, we need the money more ;D

For real though, I just bought my first home a couple years back and I get it. There's a lot I don't know still. It'll be alright, just keep an eye out for water damage. And if something starts sparking, cut the breaker off and call someone. Pretty much anything up to that point can be handled with YouTube and Harbor Freight.

I'm in the same boat. Bought a home in 2020. It's been a constant stream of fixes and updates and replacements. My mortgage payments are high enough. Now we're dumping thousands of dollars on flood prevention, evestrough replacement, random leaky pipes, furnace cleaning, deck refinishing, grass and landscaping. Wife and I both work full-time. We are dipping into savings to upkeep our home. I totally regret it. Should have bought a 2-3bed condo instead. At least we could plan for the monthly condo fees and not worry about sudden emergency fixes. I don't know. I hate it.

I understand this will sound crazy. I started running, a lot. A few half marathons per year. It's a juxtaposition of enjoying the benefits and hating the activity.

The biggest benefit is being able to handle more stress, and deal with the stress better, in general. I tell myself during the first mile (as it's the most difficult to start), "I am expanding my capacity to endurance stress and suffering" it's shifted the way I look at problems.

A recent example: I paid a contractor to build a wall to split a room, and to install new flooring on the floor. It looked nice. A year later, I encountered a problem in the bathroom that exposed a leak that's probably existed since the work was done. The bathroom is being torn apart and completely redone by me. I'm not thrilled, and was absolutely pissed at first, but it's subsided much faster than it used to. I can't afford to hire someone again, but I do have another bathroom to use during this process, so it can wait. It's shifted my perspective, and I'm seeing this now as "expanding a set of skills that can be useful again" instead of completely dreading it. Of course I prefer this didn't happen 😊 but wishing reality is different doesn't help anything.

Make more money.

Not easy but have enough surplus to cover those things.

Also try to remember all the mortgage you're paying you'll most likely get back when you sell, unlike when you rent.

Find the little things that are easy to fix. Recently I had two sections of my laminated flooring that started to peel. I got some low profile transaction strips and set them up. Worked out that the area to repair the actual divide between my living room and dining room so it looks like it was supposed to be there.

For some of the other posts I see here, in case you have these problems in the future. These aren't in order of importance.

1. Powdered ant killer that comes in the tube is better than those little ant traps. Don't waste your money on traps.

2. I had a groundhog living under some cement steps in the backyard. Tried all sorts of things to evict him, but didn't want to kill or hurt him. Tried repellents, moth balls, pepper powder, etc. Tried filling in the hole repeatedly. eventually I got pissed and started dumping the cat box in the den. I only had to do it once.

3. If you're paranoid about burglars, neighbors, etc. get some motion sensing lights for outside. And the cheapest home security cameras you can get. I started with some very cheap Blink wifi cameras (battery powered, about $100 for 4 on Woot!) years ago. Upgraded last year to mains powered Blink LED lights and cameras. Then when I went on vacation for a couple weeks, I pulled the battery cameras out of the drawer and set them up strategically inside the house. Blink charges a monthly subscription now (I grandfathered in before they charged), so plan accordingly.

4. know where all the shutoffs are, and how to use them. Power, Water, Natural gas, etc. And DON'T FUCK WITH NATURAL GAS! Let the professionals do it. I guy near Detroit killed his entire family last year swapping out a hot water heater himself. He survived. The house was no longer there.

5. Smoke alarms, get them. at least one for every level, PLUS one in every bedroom. Get the connected alarms that set off the entire house when one goes off. CO detectors too, if you have appliances that burn stuff.

Like the others said, try to do the stuff on your own. YouTube has helped me tons with that but I still don't touch electrical work. :)

I had a shitty house and it is so stressful. Just do things as you can. #1 was metal roof so I didn't have to think about the roof ever again. Get tented for dry wood termites after paying off the roof (they are everywhere here but very slow eaters). Get flooring one room at a time. Learn enough plumbing to replace fixtures, and get new piping throughout house after recovering.

My only real tip is get roommates, split these costs among more wage earners or if you know someone handy and homeless let them live with you for free and pay them a little for the work too.

You can do anything you put your mind to. I spent a significant amount of effort (~1500 hours over 11 months) completely remolding my partner and my first house, including re wiring and re plumbing with no previous experience.

If something goes wrong or you want to change something, seriously, you can do it all on your own. Spend some time researching the problem and watching videos of other people doing it. DIY everything and any issues will cost 10x less to fix.

General contractors are mostly just scammers who at best will do a shit job and rip you off, and at worse will actually make the situation worse and still scam you.

Not a home owner yet, but I just purchased a home and waiting on the handover.

This post has been really helpful! Certainly in writing some stuff down to remember 😅

I love owning a home but fuck it’s expensive. Learn how to do stuff yourself is the best advice I can give you.

I have saved so much money being able to troubleshoot and repair simple things like hvac, electrical, plumbing, woodworking, etc. YouTube is amazing for learning this stuff. A good example: I recently had to replace two hvac condenser fans that would have likely cost me a $1000 a pop to fix. It’s bad enough the motors themselves were $300 a pop. Plumbing is easy if you have the right tools (pex is awesome). Electrical can be pretty easy if you’re willing to learn (I was a computer engineer in college and a system architect by trade so I get the electrical stuff). Learn how to patch holes in drywall. You’d be surprised how much you’ll be doing that. Learn how to replace a faucet. Learn how to replace the inwards of a toilet.

The great thing about a fixer upper is you can afford to make mistakes. Take your time, don’t rush it. Make little improvements all the time. It all adds up.