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It was a quaint thing to do 25 years ago, today it's kind of creepy.
Wtf do you think I'm asking for them to give me her as a prize or something? Im telling her parents how much I love her and asking them if they'll accept me into the family, then I'll ask the same of her.
I mean, yes, that is where the tradition comes from. I would be so insulted if my partner asked my parents if they wanted me to marry someone, before they even spoke to me about it. I'm sure you know your potential partner better than we do, but it's still worth considering that they might not be as into it as you assume.
If the parents say no, do you just silently drop the whole thing? Of course not. It's kind of performative, and the message it sends is quite out of date.
Don't listen to the haters in this thread. I got married 7 years ago. I asked, but it was more of a 'hey, I'm going to ask her; are you guys ok with it?'.
Like when I proposed, I already knew the answer to the question.
One of my uncles told a story at my grandpa's wake. He was asking the same, for a blessing to propose. Granddad responded by sarcastically asking "what if I say no?"
Way he tells it, he joked back that he'd probably ask her anyway, and with that he had the go-ahead. They're retired, and still married.
Show a little resilience and humor, is my advice. Some families just want to know you can hang with the jokes - though I can't vouch for the quality of the humor, the willingness to laugh things off is rarely misplaced.
It was my mistake, but when I first read this, I understood it as your uncle told the story of how he asked for his blessing at the wake...and rather than wonder how he asked for the blessing of a dead man, I wonder what odd family would ask for proposal blessings at a funeral.
I've never had anxiety where it feels like your throat is closing up. Also, it's not going to plan, still waiting. Slow, excruciating waiting
How did it go?
They said yes!!!
Congratulations!
My brother in law didn't necessarily "ask" my Dad. He told him he was planning to ask, and if my Dad had any thoughts on that.
I think a lot of people who are saying it's creepy need to touch grass. It's not at all like bargaining for the transfer of human property... It's like choosing who'll be the first person you tell when you get pregnant. It's a deliberate choice to honour someone by giving them some information first.
Better not do it or at very least Don't get married with equal separation of your things.
Who hurt you
Probably 3 ex wives who share a divorce attorney
Best of luck o7
Mission successful
Good luck!
I can't get my girlfriend away from her parents, have had drinks though so I'm much more calm, it may need to be postponed till early in the morning when she's asleep
this post was submitted on 28 Jul 2024
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