Alt text: a text post that reads:
Work in retail long enough, and you'll eventually realize the rules for dealing with Customers are exactly the same as dealing with the Fae:
Avoid eye contact.
Never reveal your full name.
Accept nothing They offer you.
Never verbally agree or disagree with anything They might happen to say.
To apologize is to acknowledge a debt owed.
Under no circumstances are you ever to thank Them.
Remember that They are incapable of reading signs in human languages.
I don't know why, but I can only read this in a robot-like monotone way. Which makes it so much better.